Begin Again (Book One Of The Kingston Series)

Chapter Eight: Alpha

Chapter Eight: Alpha

"She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving
You know, 'Cover Girls eat nothing'
She says, 'beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything'
'What's a little bit of hunger?'
'I can go a little while longer,' she fades away."

There is a silent moment exchanged as all men in the room focus on me. I find my gaze going over them. Words pounding in my head. Kol's voice caressing a vow to never make me choose. I think of Kaden's sweetness. Kol's impulsiveness.

"Come on then." Killian's russian accented voice brings me out of my thoughts. "Out with it, baby doll."

"Neither of you." I snap. Feeling a familiar burst of anger. "Kol is too impulsive for his own good. Kaden is too sweet to make hard decisions. You are all asses for making me choose. I don't know enough about any of you to make an informed decision and you told me I wouldn't ever have to choose. You are liars." After ending my rant I am left breathing heavily with an accusing finger still waving wildly, like a windmill on a hill.

"Perhaps," Keith's voice shocks the anger out of me. He is usually so silent and sullen, for him to be speaking up... "Jasmine-"

He doesn't stop speaking but his voice saying my name puts a hot scorch right into my core. I can't focus on the rest of his words as I replay the sound of my name on his lips.

"Sounds good, kid." Killian's voice is slightly teasing. "Maybe there is a brain in that big head of yours."

"Hey!" Kol's hands shoot to his head.

"Not your head, babe."

"We're triplets, Killzone." Kaden's glare is harsh. At the tiff I look around wildly.

"Zero to a hundred real quick." I mutter under my breath. I had missed something important. Obviously. "Sorry, Keith. What was that? I sort of tuned you out."

His mouth tightens but he doesn't say a word. His blue eyes become hard. Shit. You know when you put your foot in your mouth and completely offend someone deeply? When you know you've hit some sort of deep hurting? Well, then you know what his expression is like now.

"He said you should be Alpha, love." Kaden quips smoothly. He looks a bit offended as well, probably because I called him too sweet. His words don't register for a moment.

A laugh bubbles up and I push down the urge to roll around on the floor and point at the guys and laugh. Then stand and tell them they're idiots.

"No." I don't clarify. They seem to ignore me.

"I am willing and I will obey." Kol says loudly. He has a smirk on his lips. The silver pushing out slightly. Keith doesn't seem to react to anything anymore. My heart hurts. His eyes have retreated. His arms crossed, hugging himself. Kaden has a smile on his face. His eyes are not in it and it reminds me of the night we met. It feels like years ago. His sweet accent. Telling me I'm an excellent actress but my eyes aren't in it. I had understood to a degree but now, I realize he must have been thinking of himself. Killian is hard to read.

"That book again?" Killian grumbles good-naturedly. Book? "You are so obsessed with that series..."

"Takes one to know one." Kol wiggles his eyebrows and bumps his shoulder into Killian's. Again the way they interact reminds me of something.

"Whatever." Killian rolls his eyes and wraps an arm around Kol. He leans against the wall. Kol chuckles and leans against the white wall too. His blue-green eyes drift to me.

Looking from one side of the room to the other is a little awkward. Laughing and light is on one side. The other is Kaden and Keith who both seem sadder than they are showing.I swallow feeling horrible that I upset them.