Speak | Joshifer

Chapter 3

I should stop but I can't bring myself to it. I just sorta acted on impulse.

It's different kissing Josh offscreen. I have goosebumps and my skin feels hot. With every kiss, I feel electricity.

Our mouths move in sync with each other. Josh moves his hands to my hips and pushes me against him.

I slowly begin to rock my hips back and forth on top of his body. The kiss grows deeper.

"Jen," Josh breathes.

I've never felt like this. There's so much passion each time his mouth connects with mine. I've never felt anything like this with Nicholas.

Nicholas.

I open my eyes and break away from him. Josh is not my boyfriend. This is not okay.

I climb off his lap and stand up a little too quickly and lose my balance. Josh catches me, but I move away from him and grab ahold of the kitchen counter as a support.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." I say quietly.
This is by far the dumbest thing I have ever done.

"I'm sorry I didn't stop you." he says looking at me.

"I should go home." I begin to walk to the door, but I am soon stopped by Josh grabbing my arm.

"It's late, and you're drunk. You are not driving home. Just stay here, we have to be on set early tomorrow anyways." he says whispering to me.

"Well I might as well just go to my own trailer then." I say trying to get out of his trailer as soon as possible.

"Just please stay." he pleas. His eyes are bloodshot and filled with hurt.

"I can't. I shouldn't have done that. We shouldn't have done that. I love Nicholas, and that's never going to change. And now things are going to be weird between us." he looks around the room trying to think of something to reply.

"Whoa, who said anything about Nicholas and love," he says shaking his head. "Things won't be weird. Only if we make them that way." he looks at me and half smiles.

I smile at him. "No, they won't be weird. Everything is going to be the same, no matter what."

I walk over to give him a hug. I open my arms and wait for him to do the same. He finally does, and I hug him. He buries his head into my neck. I can feel his breath hot on my neck.

The hug becomes a little awkward for comfort so I let go and give him a reassuring smile. It's okay, everything is going to turn out fine.

"You can sleep in the bedroom, I can sleep on the couch," Josh offers.

"No it's fine," I make my way towards the couch and pull a blanket over me. "It's comfy."

"Okay." he smiles "Goodnight Jen."

"Goodnight."

He turns to go to his bedroom.

"Wait!"

He quickly turns around to face me.

"Did you mean what you said? About having real feelings for me?" I tease at him with a smile

He smiles and replies, "Yeah. I did."
He giggles like a child and then burries his face in his hands once more.

My smile fades and there's a silence in the room.

"But hey, everything is going to be the same. No matter what, right?" he smirks and leaves to his bedroom.

"But don't say you didn't feel it too."
and his door shuts.