Heathens

0.4

Love drives everyone insane. It comes unexpected all the time, even in the oddest ways. Like that one story of that woman falling in love with her stalker. Yeah, people are crazy sometimes. Right now I'm supposed to be on watch but all I can think of is her, just her. She's always on my mind and forever in my heart. I miss it when she used to steal my clothes, like my green flannel. She'd wear it with dark boyfriend jeans, and this black pull over sweatshirt. Along with either black heeled boots, or black Converse.

"Kyle." I snapped out from my mind, taking a break to talk to these mates.

"Umm yeah?" I turned around and put down my gun. Before I was faced to the trees, we moved our camp a little bit further just on the edge before the forest. I turned back and there was Nath. He was shorter than me, he's like 5'8, around there I'd say.

"I.. can we get deep talk?" He asked nervously, looking back to see if anyone had woken up. I don't know what he means by 'deep talk'. What an odd use of words, unless he meant something like depressing shît.

"Yeah, sure." I nodded and we watched the group. It was probably 5am about now, I don't know the time but Cap has it and he's resting right now. We each at least get 5 hours of rest, so by 10 we pack up and leave. Reminds me before any of this happened. Before, I used to party a lot and so I threw one on Sundays all the time. I only ever got about 3 hours of sleep and went on as much days I can. I gave up they party lifestyle for her, I'd give anything up for her. I've got nothing to lose, but if I dare ever lose her I have no idea, again what I'll ever do.

I'm afraid I'll lose myself.

"So.. what you wanna talk about?" I asked Nath and he shrugged. I nodded slowly and looked at him. He was staring at the ground, shaking. His entire body was shaky and I don't know what to do.

"Nath, what is it?" I asked and he just shrugged again.

"I don't know. I just don't know anymore." He whispered.

I sighed as I patted him on the back. Everyone is losing it. We lost our families and friends, we are going to die also, but it's worse seeing the ones we love die. Having to live with that destroys you inside and out.

"I.. I know I'm going to die. I'm not going to make it." He started off. I wasn't going to cut him off, I always let people talk first. Let out what they think and feel, I never cut off a though or dream. Everyone has there own demons, let them out.

"I've been having these dreams lately and I feel they're telling me something. I don't fear my death anymore, but I'm afraid of just not going down in a fight like we all want. I miss my family but everyone is dead." He started to cry and so I pulled him in a hug. A big hug, I kept hugging him until he stopped shaking.

He is quite the emotional guy. He feels and sees differently than any of us, and I think that's special. His soul is tortured but he still manages to pull through and still go on like nothing is wrong. He's the kind that seems innocent but a freak in the sheets. Everyone of them has their own type of personality, we're all different. Which is cool since we all get along and rarely fight at all. These guys are my new family but they still wouldn't care if I died, as long as they get back to their families.

"Hey man, I'm your family. I will do anything to get you back to whoever is left for you." I patted his back and we pulled away from each others embrace. He sighed and shook his head. He looked so worried and stressed out, but who isn't? He just has it worse than us right now.

"I have no one." He laughed and wiped his tears. He kept shaking his head and lifted his gun. He pointed it at me and all I did was back up.

"Nath, you have me. You have us. We are a family, we all don't really have anyone. We don't know who is alive, since we weren't there... We should've been." I whispered and he started to come close. I put my hands up in surrender but he wouldn't put it down.

"You have her. I have no one. My family, ex, friends? Fuçking dead." He yelled and a few woke up, and started to come over trying to stop him. He didn't take his eyes off his target.

My chest.

"Nath. Listen to me, please. You have us, you said it yourself before. We are a family, a messed up one but still a family." I knew something like this would happen. He's unstable...

"I'll make it easier to get my point across." In stead of shooting me, he shot himself in the head. I fell to my knees and started to pray. The way his body just dropped to the ground and I couldn't help him. I saw the pain in everyone's eye. They were all too late. We were all too late to save Nath.

He must've been right. Everyone he loved was dead, and now we lost a family member. We might all go down that path.

"Cut off his head and give him a burial. We move out as soon as we're done, something must've heard that." I ordered and walked away to take a leak in the forest.

Just lost baby Nath..