Learning To Let Go

Nothing Could Get Worse Than This

I felt my heart drop and dread run through my veins. I felt my eyes get wet as I turned to look at Rene. My shock was echoed on her face.

“Isabelle Black?” Rochelle said into the microphone again, glancing in our direction. Rene gave me a gentle push on the back as I stumbled toward the stage. I felt all eyes on me and I tried to ignore them. Eventually I found myself at the steps leading up to the stage. I walked up slowly and walked to Rochelle. She engulfed me in a hug and whispered into my ear, “Be strong Bella.” I nodded and walked over to Alicia, who gave me a weak smile. I turned around and faced the crowd, immediately spotting my mother. Her tears left streaks in her dirt-stained face as she waved at me. I felt the tears overflow as I turned to look at my younger sister, Michele, who was pale and her shoulders shaking with sobs.

I glanced upwards at the sky as Rochelle picked a new name. Everything was so distant and blurry. My hearing was muffled and I didn’t notice that the next tribute was standing next to me till she poked my arm. I turned around and came face to face with Ashleigh, my next door neighbor.  It was the last year her name would be in that dreaded bowl and she had be called. She tried to smile but it ended up looking more like a grimace. I placed an arm around her shoulder and she rested her head on my shoulder. Three more tributes to go.  Once again, Rochelle dipped her hand into bowl and swished it around. “Hianne Glass,” she announced. There was a shrill scream for a second and I turned to see a group of Peacekeepers restraining a woman who must be Hianne’s mother. She trooped up onstage to join us and gave us all a small smile. The four of us stood in a row, looking out at the crowd, each absorbed in her own thoughts. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Rochelle pull her hand out of the bowl. There were two slips in her hand. She opened both and read in a shaky voice, “Jade Olivers and Rene H-Harris.” I felt my jaw drop as I looked at Rene who looked like she was about to burst into tears. She shuffle forward and squeezed between me and Ashleigh.

“Hey again,” she whispered in a low, subdued voice. I felt my own eyes well up and I turned away and look at Jade. She was in my class at school and was the sweetest girl I ever knew. “There you are ladies and gentlemen, the female tributes for District Twelve!” Rochelle announced. There was a smatter of unenthusiastic applause and we were led off stage.