Arranged Marriage (BoyxBoy)

This is Not a Date

*Gabriel*

So, yes, after the third ugly wolf man to maul me – and God I hoped they worked here – I most certainly would sink to coercing my eight year old cousin into faking terror so I could evacuate the creepy wooden horror barn. One whiff of that nauseating Halloween plastic smell mixed with coying sweets and clotting sweat, and I knew it was gonna be bad. She ignored me at first, the little wench! After everything I’ve done for her! – Ok, so that was absolutely nothing, but still, we’re family, she’s supposed to help me out here! Kennedy noticed me very deliberately stepping on Maddy’s toes – trying to refrain from jumping into Micah’s arms bridal style like some sort of 1950’s comedy sketch. She pinched Abby for me – I deny any allegations of having leaned forward with the little angel in my arms so she could reach. Ah, the fifth amendment, a beautiful thing. Now friends with yellow bellied cowards everywhere!

We left, me hightailing it as fast as possible while staying glued to Micah’s side. What could I say, it felt safer there. Jeff stayed behind to babysit my mom, who was cooing creepily at the morbid ketchup dollhouse massacres. Micah and I were lying in the nicely ambiently lit swatch of grass, letting my dad watch the kids run around casing after the little brats – so dubbed for pointing out dunch (lunch/dinner) was very nice - no thanks to me. Gad had come with, taking every chance to shove or lurch into me, alternately glaring and sneering at me. Thankfully, we’d lost him at the barn, him being too good to escort children through the lower scream levels of a haunted house.

Micah turned onto his side facing me. He made to say something, then stopped. The silence lengthened between us awkwardly.

“Let’s try this again,” he said, reaching gently to brush my bangs just slightly back from my eyes. So that my gaze met his as he leaned over me. “Hi, my name is Micah Payne, and I haven’t been on a date in two years.”

I smiled at him until he poked me. Oh, right, my turn.

“Hi, I’m Gabriel Arel, and I’ve never been on a date.”

“Never!” He sat up looking perfectly affronted.

“Na-no?” It was more of a question than a statement. His overreaction kinda through me off. So, yeah, I’d never been on a date. I was only eighteen, it’s not like I was going to run out of time anytime soon. – Oh, wait, I was. But that was entirely different!

Does it count as a first date if you’re already married? No? Why not?

Pause for silence ladies and gentlemen…aaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnd – nope he still looks like a goffer.

Was it really that bad? I mean, yeah, it’d probably be bad at first – for Micah, since I’m sure he had more than enough experience – but I’d get better right?

Wait, when did this conversation become about sex?

Since you started talking to yourself, gutter brain!

Entirely Micah’s fault. I met his eyes again. Yep, he was still all bug eyed. Maybe his face was frozen that way, Mom always warned me it could happen. Such a shame; he’d been so handsome.

I played with the grass, ignoring the awkward moment with the utmost skills of an avid introvert. Ignore it and eventually it will go away. Always worked for me.

“Your first date and I brought your family with?!” Was that anger or sorrow, because it sounded like a wail to me.

I was concerned when he started pulling at his hair. That couldn’t be a good sign.

“Your first date... and we brought your parents?!”

Nope, not good at all. He wouldn’t meet my eyes but I could see them. He seemed more than mildly horrified.