Love, _________

Angelic Demons

My chances are dropping

Like flies

I can only lie to save the pain

Just to cause more

When the truth comes out

I didn't have the heart to tell you

About the no strings lust

But you found out anyways

Because some boys kiss and tell

I won't be the one

To tear this family apart

If that's what will happen

Then I'll go back to wandering alone

Because I only wanted a home

I didn't mean to drag destruction

Behind me

I left my sanity at the door

But none of my problems

You have every chance left

You've never hurt me

Not once

But I constantly cause you pain

With destroying myself

And other lovely things like that

Ignore the bowl in my hand

And focus instead on the words

In my head

The ones I need to say to you

If only I had the courage

But I just smile weakly

And look away

I'm better at kissing then talking

I'll speak like Helene Keller

Watch my hips

And study my lips

As I'm under you

Trying to pull more passion

From distracted actions

My mind races with ways to explain

No I can't do this

Exclusive

What a beautiful trap I'm in

Who's to cut me down

Because I can't breath anymore

How much can happen

In only two months

I laugh because I know how fast

Things spiral out of control

Yet out of control

Doesn't always mean bad

Could I control the way you loved me

Could I control the words you said

Could I control that feeling

Spreading in my chest

I'm terrified

I don't want to get attached

Not now

I'll only be abandoned

Accidentally or not so accidentally

I don't want to sound

The way I do in my head

But I clung to your hand

As you walked away

And asked you to stay with me

I told you

I'll wait forever

As long as you remember my name

After you leave behind

This run down hell hole

I don't think I could forget

Those whispered words

In the backseat of his car

No matter how many nightmares

Try to steal it away

So beautiful

And I only laughed

Not willing to debate this again

How someone as dangerous

How dark

How fucked up

Could never be beautiful

A lot changed in two months

I loved myself

Then I could only love you

If that's what this aching is

It's where my heart should be

But I can't remember who has it now

They stole it with no regards

But I'll love you

With this bleeding chest cavity

And I'll keep all my promises

From now

To when we say we've forgotten

The face of the other

Despite the pictures we have

And the memories

Tied around our feet

I don't know if they pull me down

Or keep my soaring

I could care less

As long as you're there behind me

Hold me close

And watch me fall for you

We'll crash together