Stolen (Published)

2. Never again

It was happening again. I was seeing it again. I could hear the deafening sound of that gunshot that took the best of him that morning of the twenty-third of July. It was almost nine months ago but still the memory of the horror I experienced after seeing him lying on the cold pavement – unconscious and barely breathing haunted me like a monster under my bed every night.

 

I knew that I was only dreaming but the dream was so real. In my dream, I have lost him and no matter how hard I try or cry he just won't come back. In my dream, there was the monster standing outside his room holding the gun that was used to shoot him. In my dream he was evilly laughing – celebrating the victory he had.

 

It was all a dream but it seemed so real.

 

I opened my eyes as I catch my breath. I tried forgetting the memory in my head. Was I thinking about it again that I actually dreamed of it? Nasapo ko ang dibdib ko. Hindi ako makahinga. I could feel my body shaking with so much fear. Hanggang ngayon natatakot ako sa kanya. Those piercing devilish green eyes, his demonic grin, and his monster-like laughter – everything about him just makes me shake...

"Yza?"

The voice I heard behind me is enough to take me back to reality. I felt his arms wrapped around me, his lips touched my temple as he took a deep long sigh. Napaiyak ako sa takot.

"Babe, what's wrong?" No matter how comforting his voice was – the horror I was feeling inside just won't stop.

"Yza Joan..." Tawag niya muli sa akin. Napilitan akong harapin siya.

"I had a bad dream." I sobbed. Zachary Drew sighed as he pulled me closer. I settled my head on his bare chest. His skin was hot – but it's not enough to take away all the bad things in my memory. I could see him as if he's here. I could still hear the gunshot, I could feel the pain, everything. I just loathe that day so much.

"Yza, tapos na diba?" Tanong niya sa akin. "Gising na ako. I'm a live, we're together, and we're on my bed. I'm here. I'm never going to leave you so why be scared?" He was kissing the side of my head as he says all those comforting words. Pumikit ako. Pilit kong kinakalma ang sarili ko. Tama naman si Zach – there's nothing to be worried about. Nandito siya. We've been together for two and a half years. He's alive, he's in love with me and he will never leave me. Iyon lang naman ang mahalaga – iyong akin siya at walang ibang makikihati sa kanya sa akin.

"Akin ka diba?" Tanong ko pa. Humagikgik siya at saka tiningnan ako. Kumunot naman ang noo ko. Inis na nagsalita ako. "Bakit ka tumatawa? Anong nakakatawa?"

"Last night, I heard Yto say that to Nikita. He said in a very authoritative tone: Akin ka. Tapos ang usapan. I was just wondering, motto ninyo bang magkapatid iyan?" Tanong pa niya na para bang inaasar lang ako. I made a face. Kasalanan ko ba kung ayaw ko ng kahati sa kanya?

"Matulog ka na nga." Sabi ko na lang. I lay on my side of his bed again. Naramdaman kong pumalupot sa baywang ko ang kamay niya at saka siya nagsalita.

"Sa'yo lang ako, babe. Wala namang nagbago." He assured me. I just sighed. Pumikit ako na may ngiti sa labi. Pilit kong kinakalimutan ang takot na dala ng araw na iyon. Ayoko nang maalala ang bagay na iyon. Kung meron man akong nararamdamang kahit na ano para sa araw na iyon ay galit – galit para sa taong gumawa noon kay Zach. Galit at panibugho.