Brown Sugar

29

I was beyond exhausted fucking around with Hadia and he pregnancy. It felt like I was the mommy to be. All I did was break my neck for Eden.

The school year had kicked off and I was driving myself up the wall applying for colleges and keeping my GPA up. I barely had any classes. I took two classes each day and had early release.

"Thank you so much for making these candy apples Ray, I know you don't fuck with Hadia like that but this means a lot to me." I thanked Raven as I took the box full of candy apples from her hand.

"No problem sis. I'll be swinging through. Cause you know ya girl got the wheels now." Raven winked and I looked back at her car.

She was the lucky girl to buy Hadia's car. I was happy for her, but no where near as happy as she was.

Slowly, Janelle fell off from our group. She didn't really fit anymore. She would get upset when we didn't always make time to spend with her. After our whole argument I tried to devote at least one day to them every few weeks.

But for Janelle that wasn't enough. Raven was fine with it. She'd developed a life of her own. I was happy for her and she was happy for me. Janelle falling off only made Raven and I closer.

She was the only person who truly knew what was up between Xabrien and I. She knew a little bit about me and Logan. But Logan and I weren't even on speaking terms.

It was both of our faults. He expected me to apologize to his mother but I refused to do so. I apologized to him, because I was wrong for disrespecting his mother. But his mother was wrong for always getting out of pocket with me because of the color of my skin.

He didn't wanna hear it and neither did I.

"Girl I'm tired as hell. Hadia running me up the wall."

"You know you finna be raising this baby." Raven teased.

"Chill."

"You and Xabrien talked about co-God parenting?"

"Um, no? The fuck." I laughed.

"Why not?"

"Cause in our minds it's a break. And breaks are supposed to be fixed."

"Who you tryna fool? Yourself or me?" Raven asked. "First of all, you were fucking with white boy all summer, secondly, y'all didn't talk all summer and lastly, you can't even look him in the eyes. He faved somebody else's tweet and you flipped."

"Bitch I love him!"

"Tell him. Not me."

"He's going to be at the baby shower. I don't know tho Ray, it's like, confusing. I like Logan."

"But you love Xabrien. We went over this. You were tryna be with Logan but it just feels like the impossible."

"Yeah." I nodded.

"I just want you to be happy sis, you know that. So whatever you do, Ima support you. You know that. But I think Logan was right when he used to always tell you he didn't wanna be with you because he couldn't make you happy like Xabrien did. I didn't see you glow all summer."

"Well, for starters, I didn't get dick all summer. And my feelings for Xabrien are crippling." I mumbled.

"So the whole time you been fucking with snow storm you been thinking about X?" Raven asked. "You skank bitch."

"First love. First time. First boyfriend that ain't cheat on me. My conniving ass cheated on him."

"He too good for you." Raven shook her head. "I'm fucking with you."