Hiddleswift-the start

just a normal day?

5th of June

He sent me flowers? I only had him over for dinner once. Wow. I put them in another vase. I put them in the dining room. I'm going to end up falling for Tom, I'm just scared of what it'll do to Tom, would he be able to take the rumours that come with me the drama? Or would Tom just go running the other way? I sigh, he's just so friendly and nice and- my phone makes a ring. It's Adam, I suppose I might as well right? What do I have to lose? I pick up the call. "Hello?" I say, "Taylor, look I'm sorry I've been a jerk and I know that but I love you and you're everything to me, please give me another chance," Adam begs, I sigh, I don't want to have to deal with this. "Adam, look, we broke up and, you shouldn't get back together with people, we can still be friends but, I don't feel it anymore I'm sorry Adam, it's over please accept that," I say. I feel like crying again, "I understand," Adam says, he hangs up. I'm glad he does. I burst into tears. I can't even help it at this point. I also have a text from Tom. 'Good morning Taylor, I had fun last night, thank you for having me over,' Tom tells me. I feel so stupid, I'm here barely over Adam and I'm chasing Tom or letting Tom chase me, I'm not being fair on anybody not even myself, I just I don't even know there's something about Tom. I don't want to be without him. 'Morning Tom, I'm glad you had fun, we should do it again some time' I text back. It takes nearly an hour for Tom to reply. 'sorry I was on the phone to my agent, how are you this morning?' Tom asks, 'I'm fine, how are you?' I reply, 'just fine? why only just fine?' Tom asks, 'somebody just reminded me of something sad I did not to long ago, but it's fine, how are you?' I reply, 'I'm good, what did they remind you of?' Tom asks, 'oh nothing really, don't worry about it. What are you doing today?' I ask, 'this afternoon I've got nothing on, you?' Tom replies, 'meeting with the record label' I reply, 'oh when is that?' Tom asks, 'in about an hour' I answer, 'oh when does it finish? I'll meet with you in the park again' Tom offers, 'I'd like that, it finishes at 2, so I'll meet you at 2:30?' I ask, 'sounds all good to me,' Tom replies. I go upstairs and have a shower and get dressed. I better not mess this up. Do you hear my Taylor Allison Swift? No messing up. I take a deep breath and get in my car. My driver takes me to the record label offices. I walk in and make my way up to Rick's office. "Hi, so what do we need to discuss?" I ask, "this is what you came for," Rick tells me, "no I'm sorry not happening," I tell Rick, "look, Calvin has confirmed you two are over you have no more ties to that man, why shouldn't you take credit for the song?" Rick asks, "no sorry, I can't do that to Adam, it's not happening, and if it does I'll let it happen in my own time," I tell Rick, "Taylor you wrote it," Rick tells me, "I wrote part of it," I point out, "yes so take credit for the part you write," Rick argues, I don't want to argue with my manager, I don't want to argue about if I should tell the world that I wrote the song. "Is that all?" I ask, "no, it's not, when are we releasing the next music video?" Rick asks me, "next year," I reply. I'm just slightly mad at Rick for thinking about telling anybody that I helped write 'this is what you came for' I mean, it isn't a bad idea but I should be the one to put the idea on the table not my manager, it isn't really any of his concern. "Taylor, no we should be putting another video out before your album release in August," Rick argues, "I've not got an album for August" I answer, trying to stay calm, "Taylor that isn't is you have put an album out every 2 years in August, it's album year," Rick replies, "I'm on a break Rick, I thought that was what this is about, if you have nothing else to say would you mind if I was on my way?" I ask, "no not at all, I'll see you another time," Rick replies. Ok I decide I'm going to walk to the park to see Tom, easy enough, I have a bit of extra time anyway.

The walk is refreshing and it gives me a chance to clear my head before I see Tom, this morning was so messy and uhhh I could do with the alone time. I arrive at the park a couple of minutes early but Tom is already here. I sit down next to him. "Hey Taylor, how was the meeting," Tom asks, "so not up for discussion," I reply, "that bad?" Tom asks and I nod my head. I keep thinking back to the meeting ad the call with Adam. I can't tell the world that I wrote part of that song, it could ruin Adam, I couldn't do that could I? But then Rick is right, I should be taking credit for what I write, it's part of being honest I suppose, they're sort of getting lied to by Adam who said he wrote it 100% so would I be mean to not tell them the truth? I realise that Tom has been speaking to me. "Taylor?" Tom says, "sorry my mind wondered," I reply, "it's ok," Tom replies but he doesn't seem so sure about that. I need to stay focused, I have Tom Hiddleston by my side, why do I need to think about Adam and his song, that is technically part mine. I've been neglecting Tom again. "I'm really sorry, I'm just not in the here and now," I apologise, "it's fine," Tom really doesn't seem to agree with what he's saying, "so are you working on any films?" I ask, "yeah a few," Tom replies, "oh cool, what films or is that confidential?" I ask, "I can tell you one," Tom replies. I space out again, thinking back to my manager, I can't take a year off? Why? I don't get it, why shouldn't I be able to have a break? I've been ignoring Tom again. "Taylor?" Tom says, "sorry," I reply. I feel really bad now. "I think I should go," Tom tells me "I'm sorry for wasting your time,", "You haven't wasted my time," I reply, "I'm sorry Taylor," Tom apologises "you know for a second there I almost thought you liked me,", "what do you mean?" I ask "would you care if I liked you,". Tom hangs his head. "Wait, do you like me in that way?" I ask, "yes Taylor I do, but it doesn't matter you clearly don't feel the same way, I mean I'm not even sure you like me as a person," Tom replies. Tom begins to walk away. "You're wrong," I say, please don't go Tom. This makes Tom turn around. "What do you mean I'm wrong?" Tom asks, "I do like you, I really do, I just haven't been very good at showing it," I tell him, "so why were you ignoring me?" Tom asked, "my manager didn't see eye to eye about a couple of things to do with my carer and wanted a couple of things that I'd already said no too," I explain, "so you do like me?" Tom asks, "yes I do," I reply. This has got to be the craziest moments I have ever had. "Well maybe I won't turn my back on you completely then," Tom tells me, "so you're still going?" I ask. Tom points towards a couple of photographers, ah ok that makes sense. "Call me yeah?" I say. Tom gives me a nod. I feel like a school girl. I don't know why but Tom likes me? OMG, who am I kidding, I know exactly why I am so happy.