Voices in My Head

Chapter 0: You Don't Know Anything

"Voices in his head

Monsters under his bed"

Blood. There's so much of it. On his clothes, his hands. How? He doesn't remember. He looks around him in confusion. At the shadows dancing on the walls, mocking him for not knowing what they knew. Frantic breaths. Scrambling to his feet, anxiety overwhelming him. All he could think of was escaping from the scene. From the dead bodies lying 10 feet away from him. From the truth that he doesn't want to acknowledge. And as he ran away, he heard someone laughing maniacally all around him.

"Hands over ears

Can't run away from here"

When the bottle crashed into the wall behind him, shards of glass flew everywhere. On the floor. On him. Eyes widen in fear at what was coming next. He only wanted to spend some time with his friend. He thought it was fine if he came home from school later than usual. He was wrong. Nothing was fine at all.

"Cuts on his wrists

Scars on his heart

He's hurting

He's crying"

Ravaging fire. Orange, red, yellow mixing together to burn everything in its vicinity. Smoke stinging his eyes and his throat. He coughed violently, trying to find his way through half-lidded eyes. His small frame couldn't handle the burden. He dropped to the floor, giving up on the idea of rescue.

"But no one hears

Because no one's near

And no one'll listen to what he's saying

So he gave up trying"

He felt his shoulder being pushed aside, making him crash to the wall. The books he held in his arms made a thud on the floor. He heard laughter and insults behind him but all he could focus on was the small battered, black book tucked away between his textbooks.

"He hides everything

People know nothing

He shuns everyone

People fail to see why"

So many things bottled up inside of him. Saw multiple doctors because of his frequent blackouts and blank blocks in his memory, but they don't listen. Not a single one of them. They think they know what's wrong. But they don't understand. They think he is a joke, faking it to get attention. So he stopped talking.

"Always in pain

Nothing to gain"

He stood by a closed doorway, a blank look on his face. His mother and step-father were arguing again. Why? Because of him. Their voices were muffled, but he knew what they were saying. His step-father wanted him to be sent away, saying he was not considered family. He laid his head back on the wall, closing his eyes. After a while, he left and went to his room, a lone tear falling down his cheeks.

"He hurts physically and emotionally

In pain all the time

But no one bats him an eye"

The few friends he managed to get somehow always seem to leave him. Either by moving away or by leaving him for other people. It didn't help matters that many people seem to avoid him, deeming him too weird or too much of a freak. He buried his feelings deep inside of him and plugged in his earbuds. He was always seen in the library, comforted by his music.

"He fights all alone

Survives on his own"

He stood in front of a tombstone. The wind was chilling, but the cold felt good on his skin. The clear blue sky contrasted to the dark storm brewing inside of him. He grabbed fistfuls of his hair, the only thought going through his mind was 'It's all my fault'.

"Can you see through the lies?

All the 'Don't worry, I'm fine's

Can you hear his cries?

The boy is screaming inside"

*The words in italics is a poem called "You Don't Know Anything". It was one of my favorites to write