Voices in My Head

Chapter 20: Blurred

Hours blurred into one. Days blurred into each other. It was hard keeping track. Memories ---both mine and not mine--- blurred into each other.

It was hard to distinguish.

Who was really me?

Was I really Allan Griffin? Or someone else?

.

I lean against a brick wall to catch my breath.

Forced on the run because something went wrong. Supposed to break into this building and obtain some classified information that Dante wanted, but the place was rigged. Phantom and I, barely made it out of there alive.

I don't think it was a trap laid by Dante. He may be crazy, but he would never sacrifice his men. That I know for a fact. It's more likely a trap set by the gang's enemies. But if that was the case, how did they know we were going to be there at that time and place?

.

Beer bottles laid on the floor, alcohol heavy in the air.

It was always like this.

His aunt was passed out on the dining table, letters piled up next to her head. He crept closer, curious of what they said.

His young mind understood the words immediately. She was stressed over bills again.

Her eyes opened grudgingly, an unfocused blue.

"Allan?"

He cocked his head to the side, staring back, unblinking.

"Who? My name is Noah."

.

A stinging pain brought my thoughts to a stop. My wounds that were bandaged by the Not-Robyn girl were still healing and all that running aggravated them.

Not to mention, the mess today gave me a few more cuts on my arms and face, but it was fine. My life is not in danger. Unlike Oliver, who I'm pretty sure needs hospital care for his arm. He was hit pretty bad. I could see the blood running down his fingers from his wound on his right arm.

He was currently clutching his wound as he leaned against the wall, out of breath. I can imagine all that running was taking a toll on him. He tried to take a few steps forward on shaky legs. I was about to help him when he suddenly swayed a little and fell to the ground.

That took me by surprise. I didn't think his wounds were that bad. After my initial shock, I rushed to his side.

"Oliver. Hey, Oliver."

It should have freaked me out that I was speaking more recently. But you know, with all the blurred memories and current days meshing together, talking was actually pretty normal.

I took off the fox mask. He could breathe better with it off than on. What I wasn't expecting was Emma behind the mask, not Oliver.

.

He was floating underwater, still breathing, still alive.

He couldn't see anything for miles. Just an inky black darkness. The waters stung him, then enveloped him in their tears.

Time stood still from what he could tell.

Every day was the same numbness, same emptiness.

He tried to move, tried to run. He screamed, fought back. Only to exhaust himself, curled into a ball, breathing heavily back at where he started. In the middle of nowhere.

There was no point to anything. The days were the same. Shut off from the world, he was left with only his thoughts.

Locked in this prison of monotony, what could he do?

These feelings of hopelessness and emptiness. These feelings of longing to die, to just end things. Was what gave rise to Len, the suicidal alter.

.

Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw someone step out of the shadows. I was prepared to make a run for it with Emma when I recognized him.

"It's nice seeing you here, Raiden." The undeniable voice of Death.

What was he doing here?

As if reading my mind, he answered, "I was already in the area when I received a message from Phantom here saying that the break-in went wrong so I came here to meet up with him."

Wait.

"I thought Phantom was Oliver, not Emma." I couldn't stop myself from saying those words.

"Interesting." Dante's eyes bore down on mine, giving me haunting chills. "How do you know that? Not even the members of my gang know the true identity of Phantom."

He sighed. "Well, it doesn't matter now. What's done is done. You still have some use to me so I can't really kill you for knowing the secret."

That's...reassuring, I guess. He really loves his girlfriend to not kill me for knowing something confidential.

He walked towards Emma.

Despite everything he did for me, I was still wary about the guy so I scooted closer to her. After all, she was Oliver's little sister. And I kind of owe it to him for how kind he is to me. Although, I kind of did let her get hurt....

Dante rolled his eyes at my protectiveness. "I'm not going to harm her. I'm just going to bandage her wounds."

Oh.

I watch him kneel on the ground and wrap her injuries with the gauze that was in his pockets. Now why would he carry that around? I didn't ask, though, because why should I care about that?

I was a bit surprised to see him handle her so gentle, unlike the cold, intimidating Dante I was used to seeing. I really can't take Dante's constant switch in personality. I know. I know. I should've been used to it by now. Since, we, you know, share a house. Wow, it's really weird to say that.

I focus my attention back to him attending to Emma's critical injuries. I know he has a girlfriend, but I can't help but wonder if....

"No, I don't like Emma in a romantic way. I would never betray my queen like that."

I stiffened, embarrassed I was caught. I stayed silent from then on.

He stood back up when he was done, picking Emma up bridal style. "I'll take her home now."

It made me wonder how close he is to the Hanson's "twins". He turned around and started walking away when he suddenly stopped, making me glance at him.

"As for Phantom's identity, it is not in my place to tell the siblings' story. Ask them yourself if you want to know."

Then Death, along with the crafty, two-faced fox, disappeared into the shadows, leaving the way he came.

.

It was weird. Seeing myself wear a pink bunny hoodie and hold a duck pushie. But I didn't comment on it as I stared at who is most likely the childish alter.

"I'm Sunny. Who are you?" Even the voice was high-pitched and kid-like, innocent and naive. Qualities that before I would've wanted to have.

"I'm Allen."

Head cocked to the side in confusion. "You look like me. Why?"