We're Just Friends

Some will win, Some will lose

It took a couple of weeks, but Chris managed to find a house. He supervised the moving of all the stuff. We figured I could do the decorating whenever. So began this strange, pseudo divorce. Chris would come over and see Aur, he'd take her to see his family. So far news had only broke that I had the baby, no other information had leaked. But his family knew Aur was his, so did the Marvel family. We were already in the planning stages for the media blitz for 'Infinity Wars'. I only had to go to a few Comi-cons and premieres, Chris was pissy because he would have to be away from Aur. I was tempted to ask how Natalie was handling all this, but if it didn't have to do with Aur, we didn't talk. I was too sleep deprived to give a shit anyway. The baby was pretty good, but she fought sleep. I learned that the easy way to knock her out was singing. All pride goes out the window when you haven't slept in 20 hours. At three months, Aur was right on track. She still had amazingly blue eyes, just like Chris'. Her hair was getting darker as it grew. I sat her in her swing, she was fussing and had been since 3 a.m.

"Okay Aurie, you want a song? Yeah." She liked 'Glee' so I shuffled the soundtrack and hit play. Of course it was 'Don't Stop Believing' I was so sick of this fucking song. "Can I pick a different one?" Her little mouth puckered up to cry when I stopped the music. I started it again immediately. She watched me as I started singing. I figured I should attempt to pick up.

"Just a small town girl, living In a lonely world." I cleared off the couch and grabbed a dirty bottle." Some will win, some will lose, some were born to sing the blues." Okay, the song was good to clean to. I looked over to Aur, she was smiling but her eyelids were drooping. I dropped what I was doing and got into the chorus. Choreography and everything. Unfortunately that meant I didn't see or hear Chris come in and start filming me. The song ended and I went to turn it off since Aur was asleep. I saw him leaning on the counter and started. I clapped my hand over my mouth to cover my yelp. I grabbed his shirt and shoved him into Aur's room, punching his arm a few times for good measure.

"Ow, ow, what? It was an impressive performance! You and Jensen should start a musical act." He laughed and collapsed into the glider.

"I love how since I moved here you have never knocked. Not once." I started to put away some things. "I forgot you were taking her somewhere today. She's been up since 3."

"Yeah, last time she stayed over I think I crashed before she did." He smirked.

"Parenthood, the fun never stops." I sat on the floor and leaned against the crib.

"What are you going to do with your free time?"

"Sleep. So tell me, what is happening in the outside world? I can't remember." I yawned.

"How the fuck would I know? I'm either here, mom's, or my place with Aur." Chris laughed. "It's actually been a nice three months."

"If you like isolation." His comment actually resonated in my sleep deprived brain. When was the last time he mentioned Natalie? If anyone brought her up he just said she was working and he hadn't been back to L.A. since Aur was born. Where was I going with this? What bothered me? Oh shit, I needed to sleep.

"Not isolation if you're with people you like." Oh, right.

"How is Natalie, she taking everything okay? God, that's horrible I completely forgot about her." I scrubbed my face with my hands.

"Come on, go take a nap. I'll hang out with little bit." He stood and extended his hand to me. I looked up at him and I knew.

"She broke up with you." It wasn't a question. "Because of me and Aur."

Chris sighed and sat back down in the chair, elbows on his knees.

"Actually, I haven't been with her for about a week before Aur was born. That's what I was doing the morning you went into labor. She was moving out of the L.A. house. I was texting a friend who was supervising."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I had planned on telling you that night, but the whole labor thing threw me off. And she didn't break up with me."

"Chris...you didn't-"

"Let me finish. I had been spending so much time with you and I should've missed her, or at least felt bad. I didn't and it wasn't fair to her. So I talked to her about it and she went off. She told me you had a plan to tell me it was my baby, even though it wasn't, so you could trap me. And that you told her it was just a matter of time before you broke us up."

"Charming lady there Chris." I was seething, stupid bitch.

"Yeah, well, I knew you had no interest in trapping me. It has always been the other way around. She overestimated my appeal to the females. So I broke it off." His hands came together and he started to twist his fingers. "Then you outed yourself in your sleep and I just lost it. My game plan had been to be there for you, make you see that even though she wasn't mine, I would claim her. But she was mine and you lied. That's why I said you didn't have a heart."

"I-" I got up, stupid hormones were still in chaos. I was not crying again this year dammit.

"Not finished. But then in the OR, you said you needed me, wanted me. I was still mad and I wanted to focus on the baby." He stood and blocked the door. "I didn't forget Alysa, did you?"

"Chris-" He kissed me, almost one year to the day he got me pregnant, he was kissing me again. His hands were on my waist, pulling me close to him. My hands sort of froze, before wrapping around his neck. I pushed into him, wanting him everywhere on me. I ran my hands up his shirt and his mouth moved to my neck. I made strange noises of urgency. I was 10 seconds away from telling him to just fuck me on the changing table. Then we both heard a cry. We paused, not moving a muscle. Would she fall back asleep? How crazy did this look? Would she miss us for 10 or 20 minutes? She gave a howl and was full on pissed. Her majesty was not used to being left alone in her swing. Chris bolted from the room, I followed at a more casual pace. She was just mad, not in distress.

"Hi, poor baby, yeah. Daddy got ya." He picked her up, she blessed him with a smile and patted his beard as she laid her head on his shoulder.

=

Chris hung around the rest of the day. That evening he put her to bed and came out to where I was reading a script on the couch. I was also thinking, as much as I just wanted to throw him down on the floor and ride him, we needed to talk.

"Sorry about earlier. Probably not good parenting to screw in the kid's room." He sat by my feet.

"That was the least of my worries. But, I mean, do you think this can work? I lied to you Chris, for months. I-I've used you for years." I looked at the pages and flipped them idly.

"You didn't use me and if you did, I liked it. The lying thing, just, if you ever get pregnant again could I be the first or second to know? " He grabbed my foot, holding it to keep his hands still.

"Aurora is good birth control. But I'll keep you in the loop. That's another thing. There were two sides to us. Friends and fuck buddies. Then co-parents. Being a couple, I feel like we should lay some ground rules. Dates of the romantic sort, not just getting drunk and banging. Conversation and interaction not involving Aur."

"Makes sense, we're essentially starting on the first date here."

"None of my relationships have been healthy, but don't people wait before having sex? Like, build a foundation or some shit?" I shrugged, maybe he knew what he was doing cause I was out of my depth.

"Wow, we are doing this backwards. First the baby, then the dating, THEN the sex...I don't wike it." He muttered petulantly.

"Just give it a month, I want this to be the relationship that sticks. I need to feel like I'm being responsible." I leaned over and ruffled his hair.

"Can we still have sleepovers?"