Liberation [completed]

Talking

Warning: Mature content below.

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Asher

I sit up in bed, wiggling my fingers and trying to alleviate the pain I felt in my hand. I didn't want to take my painkillers. I wanted to feel the pain I had caused. This in comparison to how empty I felt inside was so much easier to handle. She was just three rooms away. I hadn't slept the whole night. It was four in the morning and I have decided to stop trying to get myself to sleep.

My mind needed answers and they needed them now. What did this mean for us? What did this mean for Mia? The very idea of her leaving scared me but she told me she wasn't leaving but what does that mean? At this point, I'd give her anything to make her happy. She could even get a job at her part of town if she wanted. I just wanted her to come home to me and love me.

I never cared what people thought of me before. I only cared if they feared me if they didn't, I'd make them. I would force people to give me what I wanted. However, with Mia, everything was fucking different. I couldn't just take. If I did, she'd leave. She made that very clear and she seemed perfectly fine with staying away from me.

As my thoughts escalate, I feel the sting on my hands intensify. I look down and see my hands clenched in fists. The bandage was soaked with blood from the past times I had added pressure to it. Slowly, I unclench my fist and rotate my wrist. That didn't help but I'd like to think it did.

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Mia

"DADDY! LOOK AT ME!" I yell upon reaching the top of the playground and line up for the slide. There was a boy preparing to slide down in front of me, his mother was cheering him on and waiting for him at the bottom of the slide.

"Yes, princess! I see you" My father's feeble, tired voice reaches my ear from the benches at the side of the park and I grin at him excitedly, trying to ignore his sappy mood.

"Watch me slide down!" I yell at him as he stands up and steps into the playground. He smiles at me encouragingly. His face was void of any sadness or tiredness. For once it was normal.

I get excited and jump on the slide looking down and positioning myself. I knew he was going to walk to the slide and catch me. He must have seen what the boy's mother did and wanted to do that with me. It will be so cool! He'll catch me and lift me up in the air like a princess. I was a princess. That's what daddy tells me, he told me mummy had to go rule the world and couldn't be with me so he stayed back to take care of me. I love daddy.

"I'M COMING DADDY!" I yell excitedly and push forward closing my eyes and giggling excitedly.

As I slide down I know I can feel myself fill with excitement and happiness. I wanted to feel his arms around me and feel his protective shield wrap around us in a cocoon. But unlike the other times or the actual time, I open my eyes early enough that I catch my father walking out of the park, his back huge and unapproachable. I feel myself come to a stop at the end of the slide and I watch my father's back getting further and further. My body goes cold and rigid. My heart hammers in my chest and I get scared it might pop out of my mouth, fear chocked me as I tried to call out to him.

"Daddy" I manage to say so softly, he definitely hadn't heard me. He was so far away.

Again, unlike the actual memory, he turns back to look at me and smiles at me for how naive I had been. A feeling of disorientation washes over me as I recognise the face to be someone else. Asher's chiselled, angular face looks back at me and he walks away from me leaving me alone at the park.