Liberation [completed]

The Hamptons- Mia

MATURE CONTENT meant for 17+ 

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Adoption. The act of taking over the role of a parent for another person. That made Max his stepson.

I feel my brain spinning and my thoughts going crazily out of control. The word "Adoption" was being yelled like a siren in my head. It was the background music to every thought I had. My thoughts were filled with all the memories that he probably shared with Max but didn't share with me. Did he teach Max who to ride a bike? Had he held Max's hand as he walked to school? Did he read Max stories at night? Did he have traditions with Max that only the two of them did and bonded over? What had he taught Max?

Why Max?

Why not me?

Was there something wrong with me?

As my thoughts spun out of control and I felt the cloud of darkness seep through the cracks of the wall I had built. My hands flail out looking for something. I couldn't handle the blinding darkness I felt crawling its way into my vision. Max and Adoption became synonymous.

"I got you" I hear him say and I feel the dark mist halt.

I hadn't thought of my father since the day Asher told him to leave. I had managed to make myself forget everything about him. I had managed to convince myself that everything that happened with him around had been an illusion. I realise how stupid that was. He was my father. I felt just as raw and betrayed as I had felt the night I told him to leave. Only now, it seemed to intensify. Why hadn't he told me about Max? Does Max even know about me?

I hear myself groan and I lean against Asher. "I feel nauseous" I moan.

"Take deep breaths love, it's fine. You're fine" Asher tells me "Calm down, you're thinking faster than you can handle," He says knowingly and I try to focus on his voice.

"You're fine. Just block everything out and take it all one at a time. You can do this. Don't let everything crash in on you so quickly" Asher tells me as he rubs the back of my neck soothingly.

"How long has he known Max?" I ask Asher when I feel calmer and can process my thoughts the right way.

"Erm, I guess Max would have been five or four? They were really close. Bruce stepped in as his father after his real one died" Asher says sadly.

My body erupts in goosebumps again, why him? Why could he raise him and not me? I knew I couldn't hate Max. He had no idea that his- stepfather or father? What do you call the man who adopted you? Whatever the term was, abandoned a four year old just a few years back and ran to New York. Max was innocent.

My brain immediately wrote off any negative comments I had for Max, but the hurt and jealousy still lingered just beneath the surface. For now, I could ignore it, but if Max turned out to be a dick, he had something else coming for him. Now, I could only focus on hating the man who should be my father but was busy playing daddy to someone else.

"I hate him," I tell Asher as I clench my fists.

"I know," Asher tells me, "I'm sorry"

Why was Asher sorry? I look up at him in confusion and see the remorse and regret in his eyes. Only when he begins speaking do I realise why he thought he'd ruined the holiday. Asher had told he wanted to come here so we could get away from all the drama, so we both could figure things out.

Asher was still apologising and I scramble to stop him. My hands move up his chest and I lift myself up so that I could reach his lips. I force my lips on his so that he'd stop talking. "It's fine," I tell him without even listening to what he was saying.