Careless Whisper (Ryan Ross/Pete Wentz)

Northern Downpour Sends Its Love (Pete's POV)

I had just walked out of Ryan's hospital room. He told me I needed some me time, and I knew I did, but I didn't want to leave him. He's getting worse and worse and I don't want to leave him now. I feel like a horrible person, but this is to make him happy, so I'm only doing it for him.

I walked out of the hospital and out to the vehicle. I got in and drove home, feeling pretty odd that Ryan wasn't sitting next to me. Once I got home, I walked up to the apartment, alone again... This feels too weird. I walked in and sat on the bed in the bedroom, again, alone... I felt like I need Ryan next to me. I felt like I needed him there to tell me that everything is going to be alright. I need him.

I wallowed in my own tears for a good half hour before I grabbed my phone.

"Hello?" Patrick said.

"Hey," I said.

"Pete! How are you doing?" he asked.

"Been better, but um, are you free right now? I need somebody to hang out with because I feel really alone right now," I said.

"Yeah man, sure! Where do you want to meet?" he asked.

"Usual spot?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"Ok, I'll see you in a bit," I said.

"Bye Peter," he said.

I smiled a little and rolled my eyes. He knows I hate being called Peter, but that's why he does it. Little asshole. Anyway, I quickly threw on a pair of different pants and a shirt, fixed my hair up, and then grabbed my jacket and went out the door. I walked down the stairs and outside. I didn't bother taking the car since our usual spot was just down the block. It was a Starbucks, and normally we don't even drink coffee there, we just hang out. I got there around two in the afternoon and Patrick showed up about five minutes later.

"Pete! Hey," he said as he hugged me.

"Hey," I said.

"How have you been?" he asked.

"N-Not good," I said as we both sat down.

"Is it things with Ryan? How's he doing anyway?" Patrick asked.

"He's been doing ok, I guess," I said. "Honestly, he's been getting worse and worse each day and I can't help but feel like he's not going to make it through this. I can't lose him already, Patrick! I can't! I love him to death and he means everything to me!"

I was shouting right in the middle of Starbucks, but I couldn't help it. I really can't lose Ryan. He's the only one I've ever loved and he's the last one I'll ever love. I broke down and sobbed into my hands. Patrick looked at me and came and sat by me and hugged me.

"Pete, listen, I don't know what's going to happen, but whatever does happen, I'm sure it's for the best. I know you love him and I know he loves you. You two have an unbreakable bond that I've never seen with anyone else before. If you ever need to talk to me, I'm here, and I know I'm not the best at giving advice, but I can try. I want to be here for you, Pete," Patrick said.

"You're the best," I said as I calmed down.

"Now, lets go back to your place and relax a little bit," he said as he smiled and stood up.

"Alright," I said as I got up.

Patrick and I walked out of Starbucks and then walked back to my apartment. Once we got there, we both collapsed onto the couch and watched movies. I really needed to get out of that hospital. I've been holding in all of my worries forever now and now I finally had someone I could tell everything to, even if it was in the middle of somewhere... I was so glad I had a friend like Patrick.

Around nine, Patrick left to go home. His girlfriend needed him home for something, but that's ok. I was getting tired anyway. Around ten, I got up and was just about to go to bed when the phone rang. Not thinking of anything, I walked over to it and answered it.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Is this Pete?" someone asked.

"Yes," I said. "Who is this?"

"This is Ryan's doctor," he said.

"Oh god, what's wrong?" I asked, getting incredibly nervous.

What he told me... I couldn't handle. I dropped the phone without even hanging it up. I ran out the door and outside. I didn't even grab my keys, so I ran. I ran as fast as I could to get to the hospital. Once I got there, I burst through the doors, making a few people stare, but I didn't care. I ran down the hall to Ryan's room, but got stopped by nurses.

"I'm sorry, but you can't go in there," one of them said.

"I have to! You don't understand!" I screamed.

"Sir, please," the other one said. "You really cannot."

"I need to! He needs me!" I shouted.

"Please, he doesn't need you anymore. You were there for him and that's all he asked for," the first one said.

"No! He's not dead! No! He's still laying in his bed by the window watching tv! He's right there!" I screamed as I sobbed.

"Sir, he's gone," the second one said. "I'm sorry."

"No!" I yelled as I collapsed to the floor.

I brought my knees to my face and cried and cried. I probably sat there for a good hour before I was told I had to leave. I walked outside, head pounding and eyes puffy. I walked home and sat on the couch and cried and cried again. I can't believe Ryan is gone... This doesn't seem real... I finally got my phone out and called Patrick again.

"Hello? Pete?" he answered.

"H-Hey," I said.

"Pete? What's wrong?" he asked.

"He's gone," I said.

"What?" he asked.

"Ryan's gone, Patrick," I said as I cried again.

"Oh my god, Pete. I'm so sorry," Patrick said, his voice breaking.

"What if that's why he told me to go out today?" I asked.

"What?" he asked.

"Ryan told me to go out and have some me time today... What if that's why he told me? What if he knew he wasn't going to make it? What if he didn't want me there?" I said.

"Pete," Patrick said, and I could tell he was crying now.

"I'm going to go," I said.

"Are you sure? Are you going to be ok?" he asked.

"Y-Yeah, I promise," I said.

"Alright, call if you need anything," he said.

"Thanks. You're a true friend, Patrick," I said.

I hung up and cried again. I got up and started pacing back and forth, crying harder and harder. I still don't believe this, nor will I ever. I walked into the bedroom and opened the dresser door. I searched through the drawer until I found what I was looking for. I set it on the dresser and stared at it and cried. I paced back and forth for another good fifteen minutes before I picked it up again. I held it to my head and. . .

BANG!

Ryan is my best friend and I will never leave him.