Rule #5: You're Yes then You're - No, You Just Have the Flu

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Rule #5: You’re Yes then You’re – No, You Just Have the Flu

“You are not going to college today.”

“Yes, I am.”

No, you’re not!”

“Yes, I a-ah-ahchoo!

Audrey smirked, satisfied, and she set a steaming plate of hot pancakes doused in butter beneath my nose. It would have been my seventh heaven – if I could smell or taste a goddamn thing.

It had been less than a week after the little Affie’s debacle, and as I had predicted, gallivanting around the mall parking lot in the rain had resulted in me getting the flu. Today was the third day Audrey had refused to let me out of bed.

“Now, eat up and your mom will be here soon.”

Ah, yes. In an extreme effort to keep me in bed, Audrey called up my mom every day on Skype and made her watch over me from all the way in Ottawa. It was a disaster.

“No.”

“Why not? I thought you liked pancakes.”

“No.”

“You don’t like pancakes?”

“No.”

“Well, would you like to eat anything else?”

“No.”

Audrey was unimpressed. “Are you even paying attention to what I’m saying?”

“No. I mean –”

“Save it. Now before I cram the plate down your throat myself, eat up.

I sighed, tilting my head back, then moved forward again because the sun was shining straight at my headboard. God, couldn’t a guy get a break? Glumly, I lifted a pancake up and bit it, glaring at Audrey while I did so. Smiling, she patted my head. “Good boy.”

Getting up, she dragged my laptop caddy over to the bedside and set up my laptop and webcam. She signed in on my account (don’t ask me how she knew my password was DumbledoresArmy) and called up my mom. The beeping tone filled the room and Audrey stood up, flattening out the bedspread then kissing my forehead. “Now, relax and get well soon. I’m going to go get ready, and I’ll probably leave. I’ll get Cody or Jay to give you their notes for today, too.”

The two boys had somehow ended up being in my classes for college, making me wonder how I missed them in the first place. Ink was in the Arts program, but we all sometimes met up for a round of pizza or a movie. “Okay.”

She smiled and left, quietly shutting my bedroom door behind her. My mom decided to pick up the call then, and her bright and cheerful face filled my laptop screen. “Addie-baby! Are you feeling better today, sweetheart?”

“Yes.”

“Good, good. That’s great to hear!” Her brown eyes identical to mine roved over my face before she sighed. “No, you’ve still got the flu, haven’t you?”

“No.”

Her thin brows furrowed, and even though she wasn’t in the room with me, I raked a hand through my hair and gave her a sheepish smile like I always did when she did that, before catching the motion in my mirror and abruptly stopping.

“Where’s Audrey, by the way? Has she gone off to college already?”

I cocked my head too listen for any movement to indicate she was still home, and then shook my head after hearing only silence. “No.”

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