don't be a fool [s.m]

chapter 3

amanda

they discharged me later that evening, which i was highly thankful for. i hate that hospital, considering it's so generic. but i didn't really expect it to be special.

i walk to my car thinking about him. how he hugged me and how he kissed my shoulder before he walked out of the door.

but how he was texting her right there, while i was falling in love with him in the most uncomfortable gurney i've ever slept in.

i pushed the thoughts away and buckled myself into my small car, pulling out quickly.

-

it's been three days since i was in the hospital, and three days since i've come into any contact with shawn. three slow, tiring days.

i thought about him the whole time, and still am thinking about him. i'm stumped, but have nobody to talk to. i want to forgive shawn. i mean, he's my best friend for god's sake. i've only ever had him.

i let out a long sigh as i sit at my table, looking out of the window at the pouring rain, while i sipped my warm tea.

the table vibrated as my phone lit up. i grabbed it and examined yet another text from shawn.

shawn: can i come over, i have to tell you something.

i began typing, but just set my phone down.

a couple minutes later, it buzzed to life again.

shawn: please amanda, i'll do anything

i sighed, sending my initial reply.

me: okay

i brought my knees up to my chest after i sent it, feeling a warmness in the center of my heart, which i knew was going to bite me in my ass in the long run. but doesn't everything?

-

the door bell rang almost ten minutes later and i jumped up, spilling hot tea all over my polka dot pajama pants. i yelped as the hot liquid seeped through the fabric and reached my skin, burning me.

i wiped it off quickly and shawn appeared in front of me. his eyes were red, bags clearly visible underneath them. his hair was scruffy and his lips were slightly parted.

"are you okay?" he comes near me, causing me to move back. even though i want to forgive shawn, i don't want to show it.

"manda, i-" he breathes, closing his eyes, as if he was doubting whether to tell me or not.

"what is it, shawn?" i whisper and his glossy eyes meet mine.

"she's gone. i broke up with her," he says, a light tear falling down his cheek. i widen my eyes and look away, in complete and utter shock.

"shawn, did you?" i ask softly. i watch him nod slowly, and i almost burst into tears myself.

"w-why?" i choke out and watch his lips part again, ready to respond.

"i can't lose you," he croaks, his creamy brown eyes bursting. i bounce up and rush over to him, wrapping my arms around him gently.

we stay in an embrace for over five minutes, crying in happiness and pain.

we had each other back, but had to lose a part of ourselves doing it.

i didn't know what to say, he finally let her go, for me.

i cast my gaze over his pasty face. his eyes never left mine, and our skin never parted. we stood there looking deep within ourselves. our decisions these last couple of days prove how close we are.

this odd feeling arose inside of me. i love him, but i don't know how to tell him. hell, how does anyone tell a person that without this doubt that they don't love them back?

-

the rest of that day, shawn and i were cuddled under a blanket together, watching full house and harry potter.

he fell asleep on my shoulder halfway through the final harry potter movie. his soft snores made me tired, and i fell asleep after him.

-

a/n short but a triple fucking update! hope you enjoyed :)

xx, char