don't be a fool [s.m]

chapter 21

shawn

i drop to my knees, holding my head in my hands.

"no no no," i sniffle, the tears welling up again. "it's all my fault. i-i made her go on that du-dumb trail."

"sir, i deeply apologize. she will gain memory over time, but you must take it slow. remember, it's not her fault. if she gets frightened, give her space. she'll need a lot of it in this next year," he explains. "would you like to see her?"

i look up slowly, my eyes burning as they re-adjust to the blinding lights. i nod, wiping my eyes and standing up. i take multiple deep breaths as he guides me to her room, trying to calm my nerves. it failed, but it was too late to do anything about it, we were right outside of her door.

"after you, sir," he says and i walk in, an alert amanda sitting there with her eyes wide at the sight of me.

"w-who are you?" the question rings over and over, the thought of her forgetting our seven year friendship and new love for each other shattering my heart into a million different pieces.

i breathe, "i'm shawn.. shawn mendes," i feel awkward introducing myself to my best friend.

"i'm.. uh- my name's," she looks broken. "i don't know," she sniffles, a tear rolling down her soft cheek. i can see she feels overwhelmed.

"your name's amanda," i say and her eyes brighten.

"oh, yeah. that is my name," she recalls. "how did you know that?" i smile.

"that's a long story, amanda," i tell her, sitting down in the chair next to her bed.

"i want to hear," she says and i attempt to reply, but the doctor cuts me off.

"amanda, lets get you your meds and then you two can chat," he says and gives me some time of gesture, sending me mixed signals. i nod back and he leaves.

"well," she says, "tell me."

"maybe another day," i say, trying not to get too overwhelmed. of course, i'm unsuccessful, and the tears start rolling down my cheeks.

"shawn?! shawn, what's wrong?!" her anxiety is still there. it's still amanda, just the one who doesn't know who i am.

"nothing, sorry," i wipe my eyes, mentally telling myself to man up.

she grabs my arm, suddenly reminding me of all of the times we've held hands, or kissed, or had sex.

i look down at her small hand on my semi-tan arm. in that moment, i knew this was going to be the hardest thing ever.

-

my eyes flutter open, my surroundings coming into view. the shiny marble tile below me, the plain white walls around me, and the ugly ceiling above me. i look around, few uninjured people spread out across the small room. i'm slightly confused and decide to ask the lady at the desk where i am.

"ma'am, where am i?" i ask her and she points to a sign hanging above the entrance to the room i came out of. "emergency room waiting area" it read and i widen my eyes, taking in a huge breath of relief.

it was all just a dream.

the next thing i do is rush to the entrance of the main emergency rooms, the large security guards no longer there. i smile, rushing inside.

"doctor?" i shout among the void of busy employees. a man in a white coat comes around the corner, approaching me.

"yes?" he asks.

"amanda yates. is she okay?!" i ask him and he nods.

"oh, yes. miss yates. she's doing just fine. she'll be discharged later tonight," he says and i close my eyes, silently thanking god he kept amanda safe for me.

"thank you, sir, so so much," i tell him, walking back to the waiting room silently, feeling happy amanda is okay. i mean, if she wasn't, i don't know what i'd do. she's my other half.

-

as i'm sitting in the uncomfortable chair, i see amanda walk out of the main emergency room, approaching me with a glum smile on her face. as

as she reaches me, i wrap my arms around her tightly, holding her against me for almost five minutes straight. she doesn't know the minimum of how much i missed her.

"did you miss me or what?" she chuckles, bringing her soft pink lips to mine. my body tingles under her touch, all of the worry that was still there turning into passion. we pull away, giving each other a few seconds to dig for the look of love in each other's eyes. her love for me was still there, as was mine for her.

"does your head hurt?" i whisper and reach for her hand.

"yeah, but just like a headache." she shrugs, pulling me out of the building and leading us to my car.

"i thought you had to check out?" i ask her, hopping in my jeep and buckling up, starting it soon after.

"the doctor did," she says and i nod.

"now hurry up, i want to go to bed."

-

a/n hehe

xx, char