fatty's story

13.

I'm a fucking liar.
There isn't one moment where I'm not lying, it's either to myself or to others but I can't stop doing it.
I lied to myself when I though I was getting better. I acted as if my eating disorders disappeared on their own, as if I could eat whatever I wanted without feeling guilty or feeling the need to empty my stomach in the bathroom. The lie worked for about a week until I read this tweet from a girl who was starting a diet, she tweeted how many calories there were in her lunch and when realised that her intake was lower than mine, I cried. Now my old "demons" are fully back and I don't think they'll leave anytime soon.