Change Ahead

Chapter - 14

We left home heavy hearted and worrying what had happened to Swathi. I prayed it would better if she is just injured and not dead. We both were so indulged in our thoughts such that, we did not care ot open our mouth to talk. We did not know where we were going or what we are going to do... We walked as directed by our feet. We saw lodging in a corner of a street. We got a room for ourselves. We both were dead tired. We both were fast asleep. Suddenly, I felt a chill breeze on my waist and it spread over to my navel. I woke up to see Varun sitting near me; not asleep.

I got up and sat, "Aren't you sleeping?"

"No." He said as he nodded his head. "Do you want to marry me and live with me?" he added.

"I tend to like you. I can't decide about my marriage now." I said politely.

"We are already old enough to get married. I want you Gaze... now.. I have been craving for you since the day I met you." He came to sit close to me. Put his arm on my other side placing my whole body within his reach. I jerked a bit and gulped, swallowing a gag and a part of my stomach so that I wouldn't let him touch me. He saw it and somewhere in between, peeling off my shirt and unzipping my jeans, he whispered, "You are all soft."

It looks pathetic to print, but at that time, my knees were pudding. It helped that his voice was steady and soft, his lips close to mine. That his words were an endearing mix of tender and guy. He said it at the moment his hands securely wrapped around my waist and his bare chest was pressed against mine; the moment, I will believe anything a man tells me. His light brown eyes had locked mine.

"You are so beautiful Gaze... I want to feel you. Your inner warmth. But, just the thoughts of yours are not enough. I want to be with you so that we can repeat the delicious route of kissing you, starting from the back of the neck, only to stop__"

His eyes went down slowly to look further into my privacy. I could see his eyebrows going up and down as he slowly examined my whole body.

I thought, 'He offered me sugar and wanted to know all my secrets now.' I felt an unknown timid pleasure, darker than the swoon of sin, softer than the sound or odor.

'Eyes skimming my body,

Hands caressing my flushed skin,

Strong arms pulling me close to his pleasuring physique,

Lips passionately burning, teasing my desire.

"I wonder how one's body can be so perfect with curves," he said as he slowly brushed my curves with his fingers.

I was almost swept off by him. I remembered the first sight of him and continued to think about all our situations together.

I then remembered, 'He is in grave danger now and all he wanted was sex?' I questioned myself. By the time I realized, he was already on to me winning over my clothes. He kissed on my neck; my heart skipped a beat, I lost a breath. He went further down. My heart racing in a flurry of butterflies with nervous excitement; my body was submissive to his control.

"Varun..." my voice broke down. No sound came that was loud enough for him to hear; just air. I was at the point of losing my virginity. The deepest part of me was aching to get my release.

I had to gather up courage to call him. "Varun..."

His eyes looked up as if it asked me something.

"Stop." My hands tried to stop him and push him off with gentle care, as will a mother to her baby.

"Stop Varun.." I continued, "This is not right."

He moaned like a child. "Please Varun. This is not the right time and place." I said touching his head.

"I want this Gaze... I want you. I have been waiting for this for a long time. Please Gaze." He was courteous.

"No Varun. I don't want it to be like this."

"I will be easy."

"No." I was still trying to push him off. He wouldn't for some reason. May be he felt the same. He wanted more of me as I wanted of him.

"Get off..." I pushed him hard. He rolled over slowly. May be I had hurt him or his feelings. While I pulled my blanket over me, he was already in his clothes, as if he was ready to leave.

"Come here" I called stretching out my hand to him.

"No." he stood there quietly showing his anger.

"I know I hurt you. But this is not the right place or time, or at least I don't want to do it like this. Let us take it slow." I said graciously.

"No. It is ok. I will go down and get another room. You can sleep here."

I covered myself with blanket and knelt down on the bed trying to get a hold of him. I pulled him to the bed.

"Please understand." I said.

"I'm sorry it happened. I have wanted this for a long time. I need it. Really I need it. You please understand." He came close to kiss me again. I tried to stop him.

"Varun.. This is temporary. Try to overcome it."

"No... I have wanted it since I saw you for the first time in the train station. Your beauty, innocence... I was attracted to everything.

"Train station?" I asked furiously.

"Yeah train station.. Churchgate train station" trying to uncover me.

"Did you say Churchgate train station?" It was my home town. That was the place I ran away from. He knew me since that day?

"How did you end up there? Why didn't you tell me until now? What other things are you not telling me?"

He did not answer anything. He was quiet. I suddenly felt he was a stranger to me. I know very little about him. Now I thought even if the little part of him was true?