All In My Head

Chapter 2

After celebrating, I went looking for Bella. I searched every classroom, every closet, then finally I found her in the stairwell. "Bella? What are you doing here? Why aren't you at Prom?" I asked. She looked up at me, she was crying, her makeup was smudged all over her face and her hair was a mess. I sat down next to her and wrapped my arms around her. "Ryan dumped me" she said "He said that he didn't think I cared for the relationship anymore and that I was so worried about being Prom Queen that I couldn't even enjoy the only Prom we'll have" She continued "so he said he didn't want to go out with me anymore and walked away and started talking to another group of girls" she started crying again. "I'm so sorry, Bella" I said. We sat there for a moment then she said "No you're not, you just had the best night ever, you're the Prom Queen, you and Josh are so happy, you've had the night of your life" I didn't really know what to say, I was shocked. I just looked at her, she's hurt, I kept on telling myself, she doesn't mean it. I sat there waiting for her to take it back, but she didn't.

She got up and started walking away from me. "Bella!" I cried "Wait!" I grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards me. She turned around and looked me right in the eye and said "I never want to see you again, leave me alone" she pulled her arm away and kept walking. I took a deep breath and said "I know you don't mean that Bella, I care for you, you've been the most important person in my life since grade four, don't you dare think I don't care, I do." She turned around and walked back, she looked even more mad "Maybe in grade four I was the most important in your life Hazel, but right now, there are more important people in your life other than me. You have let our friendship slide since then Hazel, you've stopped being so caring ever since you've met Josh, I've gone through so much more than you think, so don't you dare say that you care" she said. She paused, then continued "when was the last time you asked if I was okay, other than tonight? When was the last time you asked me about my life?"

I stood there dumbfounded, I never realized that was how she felt. " Bella, you should have told me you felt this way, if you told me sooner I would have fixed it before, I'll make it up to you Bella, I will, I promise" I said. Tears have started to well up in my eyes. "No, it's too late Hazel" she said "BELLA!" I cried "you don't meant that, you're hurting, please, just come and sit with me, I fix this. You're just taking your anger out on me. That's not fair Bella, just because something bad happened to you doesn't mean you should ruin Prom for me." I paused. She didn't even turn around. "You said I never cared for you, who was there when you lost your dad, Bella I stayed by your side the whole 6 months your dad was sick, and I never left your side, Bella, if I didn't care for you then why would I do that?" Bella paused for a moment "maybe you cared about me back then, but ever since Josh came into your life, you haven't been as caring as you used to be." she said "Well if you felt that way you should have said something sooner, Bella, I can still fix this, we can go back to the way we used to be, if that's what you really want." I answered "you have to get rid of Josh, if I don't have a boyfriend then neither can you" she said.

I was stunned, there's no way it's Bella talking right now, it's damaged Bella that's talking "I will not do that, Bella just because you're hurting and you lost something important to you doesn't mean other people can't have it either, I know you're hurting Bella, we will make it through this together" I said. "No" she answered. "Bella, that's not fair" I said "Life isn't fair" she answered. That's when I lost it. "EXACTLY! LIFE ISN'T FAIR BELLA. Just because your hurting doesn't mean you ruin everyone else's life. Bella, what about me? what about what I want? I want to help you but not when you're telling me to get rid of something important to me. Life's not fair Bella, I'm willing to help you and fix everything on my part but there is no way that I am getting rid of something for you." She stopped dead in her tracks and glared at me, she slowly walked up to me. "So much for being there for me, bestie" she said sarcastically. She ripped our friendship bracelet off her wrist and threw it down the stairs. I stood there shocked, "Bella, what the hell has gotten into you, it's just a boy, you can live without Ryan" I said "It's more than just a boy, it's also my best friend not caring for me" she said "Okay, but the loss of a boy has caused all of this madness" I said "The loss of a boy has reminded me that I also lost my best friend to a boy" she answered "Bella, I can fix this, you just have to give me time" I said. "I've given you enough time" she said. She spun on her heel and started walking away. I grabbed her wrist, "Please Bella" I pleaded. "I can't lose you, you're my best friend, I'll never find anyone who will understand me better than you" I said. "But I can find someone better than you" she said, glaring at me, looking right into my eyes. It hits me right in chest and I stare at her, did she actually just say that? "Let go" she said "Bella" I whispered, then without hesitation she pushed me, I flipped over the railing and fell two stories down.