I almost lost my best friend three days ago. I couldn't help but think of the why's, the reasons that pushed her to that edge.
She is the only sister I know in this universe even if we don't have the same set of parents. We were inseparable. I could still remember the time back in college when she came out to me. I was so surprised at first but I learned how to accept it and just wrap my mind around it. I am still her sister from another mother, regardless her preference, that title shouldn't change a bit. I saw how happy and free she has been since she started coming out to everybody. I've seen how it suits her ever since she had been with Blake. She may have a lot of troubles she's not telling me, but I still feel that being in a relationship with Blake changed her. She matured and bloomed from a sleeping rosebud. She learned a lot of things and she also became very patient with people. Every time she talks about Blake, it is as if both of you are in love with this person. Her feelings and emotions are contagious. You can't help but see what she sees in her and feel what she feels for her whenever she talks about Blake.
She's happy most of the time, but not always. I sometimes sense something different by the sad gleam in her eyes . It's like when she's not telling something, or she's telling me something other than the thing that's really bugging her. I put it off as my imagination since she's all smiles. She always looks okay to me. I believed that for the longest time. Now all I feel is regret.
I may have forgotten to ask her, how she has been. I forgot to ask how's the relationship going on with Blake. I forgot to ask if she's had any trouble from work. I never asked if there has been anything bothering her at all.
I reached for her pale hands and wondered when she'd be awake.
It has been three days since her aunt Amy saw her almost lifeless body slacked by the kitchen, bathing in her own pool of blood. Amy works as a nurse in the city hospital. It was plain luck that she went home early since she was not feeling well that day. She immediately called for an ambulance.
I was informed the day after. I was so busy in the office when the call came in. The blood drained from my face when Amy delivered the message. I was not able to concentrate the whole day and eventually filed for vacation leave for a week. I cannot imagine how I'd be able to work when my mind is drifting somewhere else. I immediately called Blake, to inform her if she's not aware or to ask her what could the reason be, why Lana committed suicide.
Unfortunately, Blake's phone was out of coverage.
I reached the hospital that afternoon. Seeing Julliane and Kevin by the hall, proofed that I was not dreaming and everything Amy told me over the phone really happened. I was playing 'to see is to believe' back then. Julliane was so devastated that Kevin was comforting her while she cries. Sensing my presence, she looked at me, broke into sobs and ran to me. Mirroring her grief, I also broke down and we embraced like I was also her daughter.
I decided to offer my assistance in taking turns to stay in the hospital to check and watch over the unconscious Lana.
She lost a lot of blood and underwent transfusion. We are now waiting for her to wake up from her very deep slumber. She must have thought she's already dead.
She must have hit her head when she lost consciousness which resulted to comatose. The doctor though confirmed that the injury is not severe and she may wake up any day now.
She looked much older in her hospital gown and the bandages on her arm and her head. She haven't moved a bit aside from the slight breathing she does that hinted she's still alive.
Kenny caught me watching Lana's breathing. He's just turned twenty-one this year. It has been so long since the last time I saw him. I can still remember how he blushed back then when they teased him. Lana told me that he was crushing on me when he was younger. Teenagers are prone to crush over the opposite sex who are older than them. I assumed that it was just a passing fancy. Never had I imagined, he'll grow up so fast and so good looking.
