Nightmare

life

I just realized I haven't updated in a while. I'm really tired and I have been for forever. So we're going to split tis chapter into two sections : good and bad.

Good:
It's always good to start with the good. School started back up which means routines and I get to see my beautiful girlfriend every day. I get to dye my hair a really pretty shade of red either today or tomorrow. I'm really excited because I get to help make my costume this year for Halloween. There's a possibility that next weekend I might get my first wig (I have a minor obsession with them). I can't think of anything else rn.

Bad:
Okay, I'm going to ramble a bit. So, the weekend of my girlfriend's birthday, my parents decided to go out of town. My mum's friend and her new husband were watching me and my sisters. So, on Saturday, I went over to my girlfriend's house and we hung out the whole day and it was really nice and relaxing for me (Idk about her). Anyways, around dinner time her mum asks if I can stay the night, so I ask my mum and her friend and mum just flips out. Like, no, can you not? Please? So I ended up having to go back to my house earlier then we had planned, which sucked. Another thing:I can't eat without pain. It hurts and it sucks and I don't want to tell my parents about it because they'll just brush it off because that's all they ever do. School started so there's stress and homework and stuff like that. I've been feeling really down lately and mum doesn't think there's anything wrong with me, but she hasn't looked inside my brain and seen the suicidal thoughts and the bad stuff and the self harm thoughts. I want to come out to my parents, but I'm scared. Really scared. So, I'm waiting until I can escape from them if things get bad. Holy moly I'm a mess.

Anyways, hugs for everyone.

Bye bye