It was in an instant, so fast that I didn't know what was happening until it was too late. My entire world fell apart in only a few seconds; and it was my fault.
Nothing mattered anymore, my happiness was gone and I couldn't think of a single reaso...
"Calm down, Miss Grove." Alec attempted to relax me while the Doctor held my hand, rubbing circles into the base of my thumb.
I took a deep breath, trying to relax and not slap someone. "Okay, so if I'm not human, which I am, then what would you say I am?" I asked, playing with my necklace again. "Actually, I don't want you to tell me, I want you to tell the Doctor. He can tell me, I trust him more. He'll know if you're lying." I added. The Doctor agreed.
"Okay, just go wait in the waiting room you were in earlier and we'll be out in a couple minutes." Alec instructed. I stood up and walked out, smiling at the Doctor before closing the door.
I walked down the narrow hallways, following the signs that showed the way to the waiting room. Once I got there I sat in the same chair as before.
A few minutes later the Doctor came out, looking, well, I'm not really sure. He looked like he was angry, sad, frustrated, and relieved all at the same time.
I stood up and walked over to him. "We'll talk in the TARDIS." He stated, walking out the doors without another word. I was worrying, what if it's bad, what if I did something wrong, what if he's mad at me?
We got to the TARDIS and he opened the door, still not saying a single thing. "Doctor?" I said, worrying more by the second.
"Yes, right, sorry." He said, turning to face me. "How about we sit down and have a little chat."
~
He handed me a cup of tea, sitting in a seat across from me in the library.
"So, Alec was right, you aren't human." He started. As soon as he said that I felt like I might burst into tears. My hands were shaky and my heartbeat was pounding louder and harder, but I just listened. "Let me start from the beginning, shall I?" He added. I knew this would take a while. I nodded so he started. "A while back, a very long while back, there was a war, the last great Time War. It was a war with Time Lords against Daleks. It was going poorly for the Time Lords, we were losing." I stopped him.
"Are you a Time Lord?" I asked. He furrowed his brows, or at least what he had of them.
"Yes, the last one, but I'll get to that in a second." He replied. My heart dropped, realizing how sad this was making him.
"I'm sorry." I whispered. He smiled.
"Anyway, it wasn't going well and we were going to lose. I was fighting and decided that I had to do what must be done." His voice cracked but he kept going. "I. . . I stopped it all, killing both the Daleks and the Time Lords, or so I thought. The Daleks keep coming back somehow, it's different every time. But that's not the point."
"What is the point?" I asked him. He sighed.
"The point is is that Gallifrey wasn't the only planet that got destroyed, the planets that were close to it also got destroyed, or at least had some problems." I urged him to continue. "Your planet, well, it wasn't a planet, it was a sun. It was destroyed in the war. The sun you lived on was one that Gallifrey circled around. Your people, they. . . They didn't make it. They panicked and sent children off into space, to live their lives somewhere else. You...." he stopped, taking a breath. "You were the only survivor. The others didn't make it to their destinations." I stared at him, tears prickling my eyes, threatening to escape.
"No, that's not. . . That's not true!" I ran my hands through my hair, a tear falling down my cheek.
"Astrid, calm dow-"
"No! I will not 'calm down'! If all of this is true, why don't I remember?! How would I have lived a whole life on Earth, as a human?! This is bull crap!" I screamed, standing up from my chair. The Doctor stood up too, setting his tea on the table.
"Astrid, wait!" He yelled at me as I stormed off out of the library. I ran into my bedroom and slammed the door, flopping face first into my bed.
That can't be true, it isn't true! This is all just stupid crap that he made up, it's all just a joke, a prank. This can't be happening! I convinced myself, tears streaming down my face and onto my pillow.
I screamed in frustration, throwing a book across the room that had been lying on my bedside table in a stack. It smacked into a mirror on the wall, making it fall to the ground and shatter. "Astrid?" I heard the Doctor say, knocking on my door. "Are you okay?" He asked.
"What do you think?!" I yelled, throwing another book and putting a small hole in the wall.
"May I please come in?"
"Do you want to be hit with a book?" I asked, my crying subsiding.
"No, but I need to talk to you. Please, just let me in." I grabbed another book, prepared to chuck it at him.
"No!" I screamed, throwing it across the room instead.
"Five minutes. That's all I ask, just five minutes and then I leave you alone." He pleaded. I sighed, grabbing another book, contemplating on agreeing and then throwing it at him anyway.
"Okay." I agreed, wiping tears off my face. He slowly opened the door, sticking his head through before walking completely in.
"Will you. . . Will you put the book down? Please?" I glared at him before chucking it at the wall, not taking my eyes off of his. He looked scared, though I suppose I would be too if there was some crazy girl throwing books everywhere, looking like she might murder me.
He walked over, sitting on the edge of my bed. I stared at him, trying to act angry, though I was just sad. I couldn't handle it anymore, I couldn't keep acting. I burst into tears again, burying my face into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me, rocking slightly back and forth. He shushed me and comforted me, but I just kept crying and hugging him. "Hey, it's okay." He said, his voice soft and soothing. I sat up, staring at his face, trying to quit crying. He smiled, wiping the tears off my face.
"Sorry...." I whispered, staring at my hands.
"Don't be." He enveloped me in another hug, stroking my hair. I nuzzled my face into his shoulder, breathing in his amazing scent.
"You didn't answer my question." I told him a few minutes later. He let go of me and frowned slightly.
"What question?"
"Why don't I remember?"
"Oh, well, uhm. They wiped your memory, wanting you to think you were a human. It wouldn't be as safe if you knew you were a Sarian." This time I frowned.
"Sarian?"
"Yeah, that's what your race is called." He answered. I nodded, thinking.
"Okay. Is there anything else I need to know?" I asked. He sighed slightly.
"Well. . . kind of."
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