REALITY- a goofed up nightmare ( nanowrimo13)

chap 42

Akshi's P.O.V.

There were times,

when your eyes could hypnotize me,

only that black ball.was my aspiration,

I got lost in them,

My world was that, I could see.

There were times,

When your embrace protected me,

only your arms was my home.

I felt safe and calm there,

My warmth was that, I could feel it seep.

There were times,

when your smile cherished me,

Only those curvy lines were my boost,

I relished that assurance,

My dream was that, I could wish.

There were times,

when your voice mesmerized me,

Only those words could soothe me,

I hear them coo my ears,

My inspiration was that, I could need.

There were times,

when you were always by my side.

Only your presence could complete me,

I loved you more than life,

My trust was that, I could believe.

There are times now,

when I'm all alone,

Only your memories to haunt me.

I miss you every moment,

My soul is pleading to breathe free.

I just wrote this without even thinking much about it.

It is always said that 'its easy to pen words when you feel what you write.'

here the case was similar.

I was just writing it without giving it much thought, I was just writing what I felt and I was pretty satisfied with the outcome.

I mean it was words that were always my strength and I had done a good job lately.

I kept writing every time I felt low or depressed.

it did the trick of actually making me feel anything but depressed.

well technically I wrote because I was sad.

but atleast I dint go to that self pity mode after writing.

the only thing I could do was write what I felt.

because explaining or talking about all that happen was only making my state more miserable.

I had lost appetite.

I never felt like talking to people anymore.

I did go to school regularly and did see him everyday.

but I would just feel numb.

it wasn't even funny to say I was like a zombie,

I barely got ready for school.

I barely slept actually.

I just threw the first dress on in the cupboard and with the least interest in making myself a bit more presentable, I left for school.

I use to zone out in class and paid bare minimum interest to what teachers said.

Taani and Snehi tried cheering me up and made efforts to atleast make me smile..but all was a waste.

I hardly ever gave a reaction.

I just spaced out into my own bubble staring at something or the other.

the girl who never kept shut even in the serious situations, was now as quite as a corpse.

the one who was full of life and who was a prankster, the one who always smiled and thought of everything good in the worst of situations, was now lifeless with nothing positive or optimistic left.

Yeah..!! love did change people.

AND add drastically to that sentence.

LOVE DID CHANGE PEOPLE DRASTICALLY.

'I had nothing left to loose anymore.

I had lost everything I ever had.'

these were the only thoughts that kept sprinting on in my mind.

My life was devastated and my heart was broken.

With these as my last thoughts, i entered the dreamy land where i could dream about everything i wanted. A dream where everything would be alright. A dream where i was in Aarsh's arm and we were still together as the best and the most popular couple of the school.A dream where my family accepted Aarsh and his parents didn't hate me .A sleepy dream where everything and everybody was happy.