Even though part of me wanted to go home, I knew it wouldn't be the same. Not without my sisters. But that wasn't a real focus right now. Because I had to stay in the Capitol till I was completely healed. I had to do ridiculous interviews and deal with leaving Allany behind. All of this was much easier said than done. Everyone tried hard to get me to eat that morning. But I had no appetite for food, let alone life. I think Finnick understood. He forced done a few bites of oatmeal. I just stayed in bed for hours. He finally came back in, a few hours after we had woken up. I was laying the exact same way. My steadily growing hair was now a mess and I was still staring at the wall. Not exactly what the Capitol envisions their glamorous victors doing, but it was more than I could deal with. He was throwing and catching an apple and sat down.
"You, my dear, need to eat." He said, pushing the apple in my face,
"I'm not hungry."
"Well get up."
"I'm too tired."
He sighed.
"Annie, I'm not asking you. They'll send you back to the hospital and dope you up on morphling."
"Fine by me."
"Not fine by me though." He huffed. He sat there, spinning the apple in his hands.
"Please Annie. Just a bite?" He was reluctant to beg.
"I'm really not hungry. In fact, I feel sick." I told him. Which was true. My stomach was in pain and I felt like I was going to vomit. Not that there was anything in my stomach. If there was, rest assured I would be locked inside a bathroom. He frowned at me.
"What's wrong?"
"I feel like I'm going to throw up."
"Oh. That's a common side effect of morphling withdrawal. So is your lying in bed. A doctor is coming soon, so they'll fix you up." He said. I was assuming it was an attempt at reassurance. I didn't care though.
"Okay." I wasn't depressed, like Finnick seemed to think. I was numb. Which in a way is much, much worse. Feeling nothing was like a horribly sharp pain in its own. Because there was no reaction to anything. I felt like I was dead. Though I would take my own death over anyone else's any day. Finnick was sitting there with his head in his hands. The door squeaked open and in came an impeccably dressed Allany, with Trilish on her heels. She threw off a scarf and heels on the floor, tears ruining her gorgeous make-up the moment the door closed. Finnick immediately stood up so she could sit beside me.
"Annie I hate this! I HATE IT! I don't want this life. Let me come home with you." She sobbed. I sat up and held her. Trilish shot us a frown. She knew how hard this all was. She sat on my other side.
"Darling, I'd like you to know I have resigned from being a designer for the Games. After seeing how it affected you and your family. I can't bring myself to do it anymore. I just want Allany to be happy here." Trilish told me.
"I'll NEVER be happy here! I HATE IT!!!!!!" She screamed. Trilish continued, barely missing a beat.
"I've bought a shop to sell clothes and I'm going to go by Tigris. I will only come into the spotlight when designing for you and Finnick. Allany will live a wonderful life here, until you can take her home." She said softly. I nodded, holding my beautiful little sister in my arms as she cried.
"Annie, it's so different here. I can't do this!"
"You have to Allany. It's the only way you can stay safe. I promise the day they can't hurt you, you'll come home to me."
"Annie it's just so hard."
"I know Allany. But it's so much safer this way. I can't lose you."
"I know." She began crying harder. I combed my fingers through her soft hair. I wanted to stay in this moment forever. It was killing me to leave her here. I wanted to take her home so bad, but I knew I couldn't. I knew she had to stay and I might never be able to take her home. I couldn't help but cry either. Here we were, two sisters, sobbing in each other's arms as Finnick and Trilish looked on. They were unable to help. This was something that could never be fixed. When Raviah came in and announced my doctors were here, Allany and Trilish had to leave. The word goodbye refused to leave my throat. I couldn't say that to Allany. I couldn't say that to my sister. And maybe that was why I could never forget Amee.
I laid in bed, my face red and eyes glassy from sobbing. My face hot from fear. Made for the perfect symptoms of a fever. I got morphling for my anxiety and some hydriphix for the fever/cold. I felt a million times better because of it. I ate the apple Finnick still had as the doctors conversed. They took Finnick aside and a few minutes later he walked over.
"So...the doctors think you'll get better if we go to 4." Finnick said softly.
"But...Allany."
"I know...I know. But they think it'll help you. You'll be flown in to be checked on and see Allany. Don't worry." He said.
"Are you positive about this?"
"Yes."
