(Not) Your Guardian

19- Growing Feelings

A/N- I'm so out of it today I almost forgot to put this up! That's what happens when you work from 9AM to 2AM a few days in a row haha!

Brendon's POV

When I woke up the next morning, I was alone. I looked over at Dallon's side of the bed and saw a small note lying on his pillow. Curiously, I reached over and grabbed it to read what it had to say. I'm just glad he left the note on paper instead of my forehead again.

"Morning Bren, sorry I had to leave. I forgot I was scheduled for work today and didn't want to wake you up. Help yourself to some breakfast, knowing you the only thing in your fridge right now is beer and leftover pizza. After that, call a cleaning service for your apartment because it'd take you forever to clear up that mess yourself. I'll be back around six if you need anything.

-Dallon

P.S. here's the number for the cleaning service that I used when you wrecked my bathroom, they did a good job. You can't even smell the milk anymore (you kinky little fucker)"

A blush spread across my cheeks at the mention of that. It all sounds so gross thinking about it now, but when you're in the heat of the moment anything can sound appealing I guess.

One thing I haven't missed about Ryan is having to top. I much preferred bottoming, but Ryan absolutely refused to top so I had to be the one to compromise. I mean don't get me wrong it still felt great and I don't mind topping when I'm with a girl, but when I'm with a guy I'd rather bottom.

With a groan, I rolled out of Dallon's bed, yelping when my foot landed on something soft and squishy. I looked down and saw I had stepped on my bear that must've fallen out of the bed last night.

I immediately moved my foot off of him and picked him up off the floor, mumbling an apology even though I knew he was an inanimate object. It really meant a lot to me that Dallon kept my bear, sometimes the little things can mean the most.

I went out into the kitchen and made myself a glass of water while I dug around for something to eat. I settled for some toast with peanut butter. After I ate, I went back into Dallon's bedroom to get my stuff and go back to my place before I called the cleaning service.

I gathered up my tattered clothes from the night I got beat up and my phone. Right as I was about to leave, I decided to take one of Dallon's sweatshirts with me, I knew he wouldn't as long as I brought it back.

Eventually.

I pulled on the sweatpants from last night and walked out of Dallon's apartment and down to the elevator.

As I walked into my apartment, I scrunched up my nose at the smell. Dallon was right, I'd need a lot of help. I went ahead and picked up all the clothes and stuck them in a laundry basket to wash later. I called the cleaning service Dallon recommended, and they said they could be here in about an hour, thank God.

I went into my bedroom and dug around for a pair of jeans that didn't smell funny (it took forever but I found an acceptable pair) and slipped on the hoodie I borrowed from Dallon.

When the cleaning ladies got here, I immediately apologized for the smell and explained how I was trying to get my life together, but they just laughed me off and said they had seen apartments in much worse shape than mine, so that made me feel a bit better.

I hung around while they cleaned and talked to them, helping when I could. Their names were Jenna and Melanie and they were both absolute sweethearts. About three and a half hours later and $250, my apartment was cleaner than it was the day I first bought it. It didn't look like the same place.

I wanted to do something for Dallon as another apology and to return the favor for how much he had helped me the past day or so. I used to be a pretty good cook, so I decided to go out to the grocery store to get food so I could make him dinner.

He told me he couldn't cook for shit at one point, so that's why we always ordered in when I was with him. But I wanted him to have a home-cooked dinner for the first time in a while. Probably since his parents died.

I ended up buying all the stuff to make steak, mashed potatoes, and I even bought those fancy little bread rolls and a bottle of red wine. I also grabbed some ice cream, cookie dough which is Dallon's favorite, for afterwards.

As I was waiting in line to check out, I sent Dallon a quick text to come down to my apartment around 6:30. I got an answer five minutes later saying sure but also asking why. I just told him it was a surprise and left it at that.

As I drove home, thoughts of Dallon clouded my mind. His piercing blue eyes, soft hair, flawless skin, softly toned muscles, full pink lips...I was starting to view him as beautiful instead of hot, and honestly that kind of scares me.

But, it also makes sense.

His personality is everything I was looking for in a guy. He's funny, sarcastic, can help keep me in line, but also knows how to have fun, he loved music. He was pretty much perfect to me. Not to mention his incredible amount of patience and forgiveness for me.

If I was him, I would've pushed me to the curb a long time ago and never forgiven me.

Heck I would've pushed myself down a flight of stairs.

Multiple times.

The more I thought about Dallon, the more I realized a fact that excited me and terrified me. I really like Dallon. Like, a lot. I don't think I'm in love with him yet, but I'm probably not far from it. One thing that really worries me, is I know he forgave me enough to still be my friend, but was it enough for him to ever like me in that way?

I don't know.

But I hope so.

As I started cooking, I played music in the background to keep me from thinking about Dallon much more and freaking myself out. Normally, I'd just go drink, but I promised Dallon I'd try to stop that, so music is my next option.

I hummed along to Sinatra as I cooked the steaks. Dallon should be here and moment now...right on que I heard a knock at the door. I just shouted for him to come in, I had left the door unlocked. I heard him walk in and let out a gasp.

"I can actually see the floor now! And it doesn't stink in here! It actually smells really good what are you- oh wow."

He walked into the kitchen and saw me at the stove just finishing the steaks, everything else was on the table. Everything was set up really nice; I didn't want to go too fancy, but I still wanted things to be nice for Dallon.

"What all this for?" He questioned as I walked over to the table to put the steaks on our plates. I gestured for him to come over and sit down before answering.

"For how much you've helped me lately," I answered as I pulled the wine bottle out of the fridge.

"Oooh, red wine? You're getting fancy on me," Dallon joked, but I could see the appreciation in his eyes. I took out the cork and came back over to the table, pouring us both a glass before sitting across from him.

"This looks amazing Brendon, thank you. I really appreciate it, I was getting kind of tired of pizza and take out," he laughed.

"It's the least I could do," I answered kind of shyly.

Thankfully, the food turned out good and it was a really good night. We talked and laughed like we used to before I turned into a total asshole, and it was really, really nice. And it did nothing to help with my growing feelings for Dallon, it only made them grow stronger.

And that really worries me, because I'm so paranoid that Dallon will never be able to feel the same way about me after all I've done to him.

"Brendon? You ok? You're kind of spacing out there..."

"I think I'm almost in love with you," I blurted out before I could stop it.

My eyes widened and I slapped my hands over my mouth. Out of shock, Dallon's fork slipped from his hand and clattered loudly on his plate. His eyes were wide and his body unmoving. He didn't speak a word.

What the fuck have I just done?