Alfie POV.
The past two months had been so busy, it was as though I had never stopped to sit and think. Dedicating all of my time to my youtube channel and it was growing fast. With 200,000 subscribers I had so much support and although my mother didn’t approve at first she was coming round to the idea. I had made so many new friends and been spending time with Marcus and Casper. It was a good change from Sam, Jack and Finn. In fact I had been so busy I hadn’t really had time to think about Zoe. Sometimes I felt sad about what happened between us, but as quick as the sadness came it would leave. Some say she was in a bad place but that doesn’t explain why she lead me on just to hurt me. I thought we were friends?
It’s different now, Zoe doesn’t spend time with all of our friends she doesn’t really spend time with anyone as far as I can see. Pushing herself away from everyone and she didn’t even try with us in December so I gave up on her and it was easier than I thought. Everyone gave up on her, even Louise. The only person I knew that still speaks to her is the one and only Tanya Burr. Tanya had asked me several times to text Zoe and speak to her but I didn’t see the point. Jim was angry too, one night Tanya was sat downstairs on the phone to Zoe till 5 am and came back very pale and her face was stained with tears. What could have Zoe said to upset Tanya so much was what Jim wondered and wanted to know no matter what Jim said Tanya insisted it was nothing. Apart from Tanya Zoe was all alone now. I was worried about our trip to Mykonos though; it had not been cheap and I still wanted to go… just not with Zoe. Jim agreed with me too, the plan had been for me and Zoe to stay in the same room but that just wasn’t going to happen now. Tanya still spoke about the holiday exited and chatting about what her and Zoe wanted to do while they were there but Jim had agreed that he would break it to Tanya with time. I sure hoped it was soon I don’t think I will last through another one of Tanyas excited moments.
Sighing I ran for the last bus of the night. Though it was now the beginning of February it was still freezing cold outside and I had forgotten my jacket this morning as I left my flat to meet Caspar and film some videos before he went back to South Africa for his mums birthday. We had filmed a ‘what I miss about school video’ and I knew it was going to turn out hilarious, mine and Caspars videos always do. My phone vibrated and buzzed in my pocket and I pulled it out with shaking hands that were now blue from the cold. Louise was ringing me, how strange! Since December Louise had also been spending more time with Darcy and Matt, nobody had a problem with that but I wondered what would make her ring me at 11pm on a rainy Tuesday night. I answered to find a hysterical Louise.
“Alfie Alfie have you seen zoes tweet? Stop her alfie please.” An exasperated voice echoed my mind.
Before I had even replied Louise had hung up leaving me stranded on the edge of London in the rain confused and worried. I quickly opened the twitter and searched for Zoe I had long since unfollowed her,though it didn’t take me long to find her I scanned through her recent tweets. She had no tweets from about 3 weeks apart from one that was posted 15 minutes ago. It read: “This is the end, goodbye everyone.”
I stopped in my tracks and emoticons washed over me like a tsunami wave. My bones froze, not because of the cold but a feeling I had long blocked out. A feeling that I had never felt before for anyone but the pretty girl with the slim waist and the beautiful long hair the girl that woke in the night shivering and crying, needing me, the girl that had not left my troubled mind since the lonely night I cried myself to sleep in Louises house, the girl that took over my world and without her I wasn’t a person just a body. Walking, laughing, smiling but none of it was real because without her I was lost, broken and hurting. That night haunts me. The night I realized Zoe Sugg does not care about me, I was all part of a game. But the worst part about it all was I thought I knew her, I thought I knew the girl with the smile and the sparkle in her eyes but I didn’t and I’m not sure I ever will now.
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Hey guys so im not sure if i should carry on with this?
let me know
