Broken

Chapter 5: Trying

Once again, I woke up on the bed. My body was sore and it hurt to sit up. I realized I was tucked underneath the blankets again. My side hurt terribly. I ran my hand over my side to feel new stitching. Raquel must have finished while I was out. My head ached and I felt something wet on my forehead. I raised my hand to feel a wet cloth across my head. My eyes throbbed and my vision was blurred. I turned my head to try to shake my vision clearer and almost jumped out of bed to see Raquel, sitting on a chair by my bedside, resting her head on her arms. She was soundly sleeping.
I placed a hand on her shoulder and gently shook it a little.
"Ray...Ray...?"
She stirred, living her head that was only inches from my face, looking me directly in the eyes. She jumped back in her chair, I noticed a dull red tint of color in her cheeks.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, absolutely!" Her tone was a bit sheepish, but as she scanned her eyes over me, her face turned more stern. "I'm more concerned about you. You've been out since yesterday."
"I-I've been out for that long?"
She nodded.
"You developed a fever last night. I tried my best to keep it down. It only broke this morning. And considering you woke up, I take it you must be feeling better."
I was sick?
I sat up and rested the inside of my wrist on my forehead. It was slightly warm. Not to mention my throat still felt raw and sore. My head was throbbing so hard that the pain moved down into my eye sockets. I pressed my fingers in the crook of my nose and scrunched my brows in hopes to lessen the pain.
"Raquel."
"Yeah?"
"Do-do you have anymore aspirin?"
Raquel chuckled softly and smiled at me. She had a very pretty smile.
"I'll be right back."
She gets up and walks out of the room, leaving me alone. As my body fully began to wake up, I could feel how terrible and sluggish I really felt. I groaned and rested my head back on the soft pillows, letting my eyes close for a moment...or at least it seemed like a moment until I felt a hand jerk my shoulder.
"Hey. C'mon buddy, come back!"
My eyes shot open and saw Raquel next to me with two aspirin and another glass of water. "Here ya go."
I politely took it and nodded as I swallowed the pills. I only took small sips from my glass this time due to my sore throat.
Normally, me and my brothers rarely ever got sick.We have pretty strong immune systems. I usually get sick only once a year, I guess this time counts.
"Thank you."
Raquel smiled, "No problem."
"No I mean, thank you for everything. I have wanted to thank you before. It's not often I'm the one who's damned."
Raquel laughed.
"Well you don't have to worry anymore. We're safe. My family's lodge is pretty secluded out here so I wouldn't be worried about being seen by anybody."
I only nodded.
"Make yourself at home. " She gave me a bright and cheerful smile. If I didn't feel so miserable I would've returned the gesture. That was the first time I ever seen her smile like that.
"But today, I suggest you get a lot of bed rest. So just holler if ya need anything."
"He,he, yes ma'am."
"I'll be back to check on you later."
And with that, she left the room, I saw her glance back at me before she shut the door completely behind her.
It was nice to think that someone cares so much about me to go to such lengths as to let me stay. She never viewed me as a freak, not even when we first met. Raquel was different. She was willing to help me rather that run from me. This feeling grew inside me. My heart fluttered at the thought. I didn't know how to really react to these feelings or why I was having them, maybe cause I'm sick. But I shrugged it off and snuggled under the warm blankets closing my eyes and let myself fall into an actual decent sleep...at least for now.

POV: Raquel
I felt horrible for Leonardo. He blames himself for what Quinn did to me. I can see it. To be honest I could care less for what happened. I was alive and that's all that mattered to me and now we were safe. But Leonardo feels this unnecessary guilt. After everything he's already been through, he doesn't need to burden himself the way he is.
It was nice meeting someone different for a change, though even though I might be quite literal about that, considering he is actually a mutant turtle. The world never ceases to amaze me. And granted the place we met was a little less than pleasant. God, I hated that bastard Quinn for the harm he inflicted. He is an insane madman.
I was just thankful to escape my containment and get us both the hell out of there. It pays to commit the lock combination to memory. After the guard put it in a million times. I had to break the glass and reach for the lock. My hand's still tender from punshing through the glass, but I had it bandaged, and the pain was bearable.
I probably shouldn't think about it too much. I should just get some sleep. I have been up since last night making sure Leo's fever wouldn't go up. But since he's sleeping in my bed, I guess I'll sleep in my parents room. I never stopped thinking about them since I was captured. I miss them so much. I know they're probably searching for me. No matter how much I want to, I can't go back to them, not while this whole mess is following us. Besides, I couldn't help but wonder if my family would think of me differently cause of my...new looks.
I dressed into my marvel hero pajamas and climed into bed. For some reason I couldn't get my brain to shut off. I tossed and turned for about 20 minutes before I decided enough was enough. I needed some coffee. It always had the reverse effect on me, maybe it would help.
Trouble was, Leonardo was sleeping in my room, which was right next to the kitchen.
I tip toed through the hallway, passed my bedroom door and into the kitchen. I got a mug from the cubbart and started up the coffee maker. I watched the liquid pour into my cup and waited for it to cool. After I added my cream and sugar I took my steaming cup back to the room. Before I made it passed my door, I heard muffled noises coming from inside my bedroom. I quietly cracked open the door and peeked inside to see if Leo was up. But he wasn't. He was asleep, but he was tensely curled up in his bedsheets, slightly tossing and turning his head, murmuring gibberish.
I got worried, maybe his fever was coming back. I turned on the light and went over to his bedside and placed my coffee on the side table. I placed my hand on his burning forehead. I was right, his fever rose again. His breathing was labored, and sweat beaded his forehead. I couldn't understand what he was mumbling. Leo's voice began to get louder.
"...N...N-no...No...get...away...get-get away....hrmph...I-I tried...get out-get out of my head..."
I could tell he was having a nightmare. I needed to wake him up. I gently touched his shoulder and shook it.
"Leo! Leonardo, wake up!"
He jolted up in bed. His eyes shot open, his mouth was gaping, heaving for air. When he looked up at me, his blur eyes looked like they were on the verge of tears.
"It's okay, it's okay, it's just me." I said gently. My voice barely above a whisper.
I noticed his chest relax to steady breaths. His expression calmed and his eyes softened.
"I'm sorry. D-did I wake you up?"
"No, no, not at all. I was already up. Are you okay though? You were having a nigh-"
"A nightmare? Yeah, you'd be right. I get them a lot, so just go back to bed, I'll be fine." He glanced at me sadly and pulled the covers over his head.
"Are you sure Leo? Your fever sparked again, I can get you some NyQuil to help you sleep through the night."
"No, I'll be fine...just please leave."
I was kind of surprised at his response, his voice sounded a bit shaky.
"Leo," I leaned over closely to his ear and spoke softly. "Leo, I only want to help you."
"Just...please go."
I closed my eyes and sighed. "Very well then..." I grabbed my mug of coffee and slid it closer to him on the table by the bed.
"Here. It helps me sleep, it should help you too."
I turned off the light. I felt slightly hurt that he was waiting for me to leave. A part of me wanted to stay, but I respected his wishes and shut the door behind me.

POV: Leonardo
Running...running...running towards my brothers. Trying to save them. The same echoing screams played on repeat. But with every step I took to reach them, the further they were away from me. I ran to catch up, but couldn't get to them fast enough.
Further... further...too far...miles away...gone.
"No! Wait!"
Everything went black and I found myself falling into an endless black abyss.
I failed.
I couldn't even save them in my dreams. My dreams never have any happy endings.
Emptiness somehow broke my fall. Everything was black. I looked down, there was no floor. I was standing on nothing but somehow standing. A breeze surrounded me in a whirlwind. The wind was eerily calling my name.
That's when everything began to shake. I began sprinting to try to escape my imagination. Another earthquake arouse. I suddenly tripped over my own feet and started falling into nothing once again. I listened to the voice in my heaad as I fell, it was clearly taking pleasure in my fear. Saying horrible things to me.
You're a failure. You couldn't save your family when they needed you most. What kind of brother is that Leonardo?
"No. I tried to save them. I TRIED!"
You didn't try hard enough! All those years of training and you're still helpless.
"Shut up!"
Your brothers are disappointed in you Leonardo. They blame you for what you couldn't do. They hate you. Now they think you are useless.
Tears welled in my eyes. I felt like curling into a ball and crying until the voice in my head stopped. What if the voice was right? Maybe I am useless. I'm the eldest, and the most responsible. I was supposed to look out for my family and I let them down.
Yes, you did Leonardo.
I couldn't take it. I pressed both my hands to my head.
"Just shut up! Stop It! Get out of my head!"
You're weak.
"Stop it!"
Goodbye useless...
Was the last thing I heard before I opened my eyes to see myself falling into fire.
"Leo!"
It was just a nightmare, thank God. My heart was beating out of my chest. Air was so sweet to to my lungs. I felt tears starting to dry on my cheeks. Raquel's hand rested on my shoulder. Her face was full of concern.
"I'm sorry. D-did I wake you up?"
Her expression softened and her eyes were sparkling.
"No, no. Not at all. I was already up. Are you okay though? You were having a nigh-"
I had to stop her there. I didn't feel like talking.
"A nightmare? Yeah, you'd be right. I get them a lot. So go back to bed. I'll be fine."
I pulled the blankets over my head, trying to avoid a conversation.
"Are you sure Leo? Your fever sparked again. I can get you some NyQuil to help you sleep through the night.
I put a hand on my head. She was right. My headache returned. I felt congested to the point I couldn't breathe through my nose. I felt hot. Every muscle in my body hurt.
I really needed the NyQuil and probably should've taken it. But a part of me felt like I needed to suffer.
"No. I'll be fine...just please leave."
"Leo," Raquel leaned in close to my heart. Her warm breath on my skin made me shudder and blush like mad. "Leo, I only want to help you. "
I felt so sick, I didn't want to be alone, but I had to be.
"Just...please go. "
I turned over and hid my head under the covers. I didn't want her to see the freshly shed tears running down my face.
I heard her sigh behind me. "Very well then..."
She grabbed something and moved it closer to me on the table.
"Here. It helps me sleep. It should help you too."
I silently waited for her to leave. The sound of the door echoed in the room as I heard the door shut.
I felt like a complete asshole.
She was only trying to be nice. It was too late to apologize now. That and I didn't feel like getting out of bed for the sake of me throwing up on the floor. I rolled over to look at the object she left for me, though it probably wasn't even meant for me in the first place.
A steaming mug, with a relaxing aroma on coffee rising up from it. I sit up uneasily, grabbing the cup in my hands and took a few sips to see if my stomach would rebel. It was a bit too sweet for me, but it would be rude to complain. I drank the rest of the coffee. I was already beginning to feel sleepy.
Though of Raquel Cross began to swarm in my already pounding head, mainly regrets. She has been so kind and hospitable to me, and what have I showed her in return?
Starting tomorrow, everything would be different. It has to be.

Sorry it took me so long to update. I've been suffering from major writer's block with this book. But at least I finished this chapter I started a while ago.
Poor Leo though, he's sick and going through a lot of PTSD symptoms. Why am I so evil?!!! Anyway here it is. Thank you for hanging in there. I know you've been waiting for me to update this book.