Twins | Jungkook

Chapter 13

[EDITED]

"Have you calmed down a bit?" You flicker your eyes open, your eyes wondering around your surroundings, you found yourself in your bedroom. He gave you a warming smile, drawing small circles on the back of your hand with his thumb.

Behind the smile lays a concerned and perturbed boy.

Though his eyes showed the kind of gentle concern, Jiyeong used to have. Letting go of your hand, he laid his hand lightly on your shoulder, and instead of flinching like you usually did, you felt soothed by it. He left his hand there and spoke with such a soft voice you felt his words calming you even more by the way they were said than the actual words. It felt as if you were wrapped in a blanket of his caring.

How could you not consider your actions now, now that you could see how profoundly they effected him too.

"Better but still traumatised?" It was harder than expected but you managed to utter words. However it sounded more like a question than a statement, he looks at you confused, you sounded unsure and uncertain of how you currently felt. That was the first break up, and your first love had it destroyed.

He destroyed every little small bits of pieces left to keep you from shattering.

"Could you leave me for a while.." This time your voice had a stronger tone, like you wanted him actually out of your room. You still wondered why he was here watching you with worried eyes when you remembered he said he doesn't want to deal with you when you're hurt. Your face wore a puzzled expression and his reflected the same, the surging perplexity

Even though you called for him.

He nodded understanding you, he knew you needed space even though he didn't want to leave you, he didn't want to push it further. He stood up, his hands brushing against your cheek and went towards the door, exiting with a quiet shut. Once he was out he went downstairs and waited for you patiently, passing time on his mobile phone. He tried to distract himself from all the thoughts of you but you were still in the centre of everything.

You removed the covers that protected you from the cold and slid your warm feet in your house slippers. The coldness of the base of the slipper shot electricity and goose bumps all over your body, shivering from it. You weakly walked to your bathroom and slid the door open, the first thing you saw was yourself. Your weak and fucked up self in the mirror caught your attention, you came closer and touched your features with your fingertips.

Everything about you look plain-looking, almost hideous.

'Of course he would leave me.. I'm such a plain girl' You look fixedly at yourself, your eyes no longer had that crystallised glow, how your eyes used to reflect anything you see from how clear and bright it was, but that was when you were still happy with him.

How did everything change?
Why did it change?
And when did it change?

Three questions you've been asking yourself ever since you started doubting him. All three questions were still left unanswered and you will never get them. It's better to not know, for now. However the feelings and emotions were still present in your heart, everything played like a broken record, over and over again.

Like a horror movie it played again in your mind as if somehow your brain was unwilling to let the images go and in it's attempt to analyse them it made you see it all over again. You forgot what you had to do next, why you told Jeongguk to leave, everything slipped through your mind like so much sand in an hour glass. With the door open, you could see the reflection of the sky from your balcony through the mirror. You stared out of the window at the scudding white clouds and longed to be amongst them, soaring and carefree. You knew the more you tried to suppress it the more it would play again, but you couldn't help it.