Melia-Irrevocable Journey (Sequel to Irrevocable Quest)

019:

019:

She sat on the beach staring out at the foggy outline of the island across the channel. She could see it on a good day clearly and therefore avoided it, but today wasn't a good day, it was foggy and only a dim outline was visible. She wore a sweat suit, heavy, and had wrapped Hannah in blankets and a sleeper. Last night had been a disaster as far as she was concerned. And today the internet had reported her a media smash. The paparazzi portrayed her as a schmoozing hussy. Pictures of her and Tom Roberson, both recently separated from spouses... it was indecent. And then pictures and reports of Tom and Matthew fighting over her.... Again, the lack of privacy and the twisting of the truth was disgusting.

Sure, she'd been slightly attracted to Tom, in a weird sort of way, and she was slightly attracted to Matthew as well, and she was too far gone in her grief cycle to acknowledge any of it. It was all wrong, she felt all tangled up inside.

She hung her head, wanting to cry, but unable to.

Out there, on that island, she'd had a few happy days, so happy they were blinding in contrast to now. Now was confusion and pain and weariness, so much weariness she just wanted to take Hannah and go find Jared, no matter where he was.

She actually pursued that thought for a moment, and pictured them all together as a family, somewhere white and pristine and golden and glowing. It wouldn't be so bad. Dying. Exiting the rat race. It wouldn't be fair to Hannah who had just got to her earth life, but she... the longing for Jared filled her with anguish and she squeezed her eyes shut, no amount of imagining his arms around her helped.

She was alone! Alone!

"Your mom told me where to find you." Came a voice from behind her and Melia wanted to swear, whoever it was had just interrupted her only peaceful fantasy, not to mention her suicidal fantasy, and the startlement caused an immediate build.

She turned and looked up into the dawn grayness. An apparition appeared, someone from another life, another world. Not this life, and not this place, and not this time.... She could do little else but stare.

He sat down beside her on the sand, close, too close. It couldn't be!

How had she conjured Ryan and not Jared?

Melia felt her heart race to her mouth and choke her. The apparition reached out and touched her crossed arm below the baby's falling blanket. The build was gone almost instantly. "Wow, it's been awhile." Came the voice again.

She shuddered and blinked. "Ryan?"

"Bet you're kind of surprised to see me." He said again. She still couldn't talk, so he leaned over and pulled the blanket back so he could see Hannah. Her little sleeping face screwed up at the onset of brighter light and then settled as she adjusted to it. "Hello, little niece." He said tenderly.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" Melia cried through her clogged throat.

He shrugged. "I quit."

"You quit your--- mission?" she whispered appalled.

He nodded, looking out to sea. "Yeah. I did. For now. I couldn't handle it, Melia. I wasn't doing anybody any good. I can't seem to get over what happened. So, I decided to take a leave of absence and get my life straightened out."

"I can't believe it." She didn't want to believe it, couldn't fathom it. It was unheard of in her own family, and... well... people did leave their missions, and he certainly did have reason to grieve and get his life in order. She couldn't' blame him, considering the kind of life she herself was living. "You left your mission?" Her tone still sounded stunned, and her arms tightened and Hannah squirmed and woke up, fussing at the constriction.