You know what you did

Chapter 13: Unforgiving Tears

Alex's P.O.V.

My bare feet padded angrily along the sidewalk as I make my way back towards my home. I angrily chew on my lip as I grip my shoes tighter in my left hand. My right hand is holding the vibranium that Jake gave me, it took hours of dealing with his shit, but the deal is done, and now the job is going to be taken into the next phase.

You're an idiot, if you think you have the guts to kill him.
I can kill anyone.
Sure you can, if you've never met any of them, and you literally have no feelings for anybody...except one man in particular. 
Shut up, I do NOT.
Sure you don't, keep that vibranium close. It's not like you're gonna use it.

I clench my teeth as the voices echo through my head. I don't have feelings for Wade...do I? I can't, I'm an assassin, I have no emotions. I'm like One Punch Man. Except I can't kill people with just one punch....it would be nice though.

I feel a presence behind me as I continue to make my way home. My senses heighten themselves, my ears straining to hear behind me. Their feet match mine with each step, making it hard to tell details about the person. I pretend to trip over my own feet, stumbling, and going back to walking, this time at a slightly slower pace. I hear the footsteps faulter, trying to catch up with the changes in my speed. 

The person's steps sound heavier, it must be a man. 

I bet it's Wade.
I highly doubt that.
It's what you're hoping for anyways. 

I cringe at myself as I whip around, 'accidentally' letting go of my shoes, sending them flying into the body of my stalker. 

"Sorry." I smirk as Wade glares at me whilst groaning. 

You really aren't sorry.
It's a mix of both humor, and actual apology. You're part of my mind, you should know.
'Sorry'.
Now that was sarcasm. Shut up.

"I bet you're really not." Wade replies, tossing my shoe back at me. I make an attempt to hide my smile as I catch the shoe, allowing my hair to seep across my face to hide any emotions. I'm supposed to be this heartless assassin. I guess I really don't know myself anymore.

Not since Wade showed up, you mean.
Didn't I tell you to shut the fuck up?!

"I guess that's for you to decide." I Keep my head down, turning back to the direction of my house, and starting to walk again, with Wade still behind me.

"But why are you following me?" I ask, suddenly curious of his actions.

"Because I wanted to know if you were okay." I stop dead in my path, Wade kept walking forward till he was standing right besides me. I refuse to make eye contact, even when he leans down to try and look at my face, searching for any emotions what so ever.

"What's wrong?" He asks when I don't reply to his earlier question.

"No one has ever asked that to me before..." I trail off, my eyes sting as flashbacks crowd my memory. For once, the voices in my head are silent as I relive my past in little blurbs. Water blurs my vision as I suddenly begin walking once again, trying to blink away the tears that threaten to fall. 

"Alex?!" Wade calls, his footsteps jogging to catch me, grabbing my arm when he does. His hands are warm, wrapping around my muscular arms. I try to pull away from his grasp, but somewhere in my mind, I want this. I want him to hold me in his warmth. I long for someone so hug me again. I need  love.

You've never had love. 
That's why I crave it.
How can you crave something you've never had?

For once I agree with myself, how can I want this? It's like there's this strange pull that attracts me to Wade. Even the other part of him, Deadpool, the swashbuckling anti-hero with a sick sense of humor. It reminds me of myself. We are both broken, although I don't know much about his past, I can see it in his eyes. AS if whatever left of his soul is trying to reach out to te fragments of mine. 

"Alex, are you okay?" Wade pauses, "Who was that guy?"

I rip my arm out of his grasp, still refusing to look at him. Some small part, as much as it longs for belonging, it's also telling me to run right now. After all, it's all I've ever really known how to do. Kill, and run. And in this case, all I can do is run. I toss my shoes behind me, distracting Wade from me as I make my escape, running at a full sprint in the opposite direction, taking a different and longer route to my house, making sure I can lose him along the way.

What are you doing?
What are you talking about? 
Why did you run?You're the one who wanted me to leave, you're the one who doesn't want me anywhere near Wade. After all, he's a merc with a mouth. He's Deadpool.
Have you ever listened to me? 

I slow my running pace slightly, faultering and tripping over the sidewalk.

No, not really. 
Then why listen now, when it can really matter?
I-
Why listen now, when this can be your only chance at someone accepting you?
What are you-
Why listen now, when you like him?

I stop completely, scrapping my feet against the hard concrete, my hair sticking out in random places, full blown tears streaming down my face. I haven't cried in years. And it feels sooo good.

I walk back to my house, noticing Wade standing in front of my shitty house, right in front of the garage door, my shoes in his hands, his eyebrows crinkled in worry.

I keep a steady pace, my face hidden behind my frizzy hair, walking straight towards him.

"Alex?" Wade seems like he's gonna say more, but I slam into him, my body pressed fully into his. My arms wrapped around his neck, clinging to him in the tightest hug ever. Almost as if he's my lifeline, which, I didn't know I had till today. Till just a few minutes ago.

"No." I say quietly.

"No, What?" Wade asks, confused with his face muffled in my hair as he returns my tight embrace, recognizing it as a call for help.

"I'm not okay." I let out my first sob in years. This, this right here is good. I haven't had much experience with good, but I know that this right here....this is it.

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Guess who's back.
Back Again.
The author's back.
Tell a friend.
Guess who's back 
Guess who's back
Guess who's back
Guess who's back
Guess who's back