Notes - Phan High School AU

Story

Hi guys,
Sorry this isn't a chapter but I just wanted to share with you a little story about what happened to me yesterday to hopefully encourage anyone in the same situation to do something about the issue before it gets to where this got me.

I was in town with my friends (we were celebrating a birthday) and towards the end if the day we walked down to a local park.
If any of you have seen the a/n that I put up a while ago before deleting 3 days later you will know that i was bullied everyday for 3 years and that it still happens now so my mental health is kinda crappy.
Anyway, while we were at the park my friends and i heard some homophobic remarks said that were aimed at us. We are like the lgbtqi+ group in our year so quite a few of us took this personally. Eventually they had come over and were saying these things to our faces. We basically told them to "fuck off" (thanks emma) and they then started throwing rocks at us while insulting us further.
We didn't throw anything back but one of my friends was hit in the eye and her girlfriend was hit in the neck.
By this point i was starting to feel sick so i asked my best friend, mia, if we could move away. She nodded and walked away with me.
I sat on a small wall out of sight and i couldn't breathe properly. I was taking raspy, rapid breaths and i started crying. My friend Zoe came over and tried to comfort me. She said that one of them had punched ethan and he had hit back. She also told us that Marlena had been filmig for the last 10 minutes on her phone and that olivia was thinking about calling the police.
She went back to get our bags so i could go and get a drink. When she left i continued to break down all while Mia was trying to comfort me.
That is when i lost feeling and movement in my figers.
It started as a tingling, similar to pins and needles, before growing painful.
When Zoe got back i was in the middle of half shouting at myself and mia. "I told myself that what happened during the 3 years wouldnt effect me anymore! And yet here i am crying about what some homophobes said!" Zoe hugged me and mia before laughing quietly and whispering to me, "even though you hadn't come out to us yet, we all knew you were queer."
I smiled weakly and the rest of my friends came running around the corner. A chorus of are you ok and what happened all came at once.
By this point i couldn't feel my toes and i couldn't speak.
Mia knew exactly what was going on and answered their questions before saying, "guys we need to go and get her water or she wont be able to get back up."
At this point i stopped breathing. Mia looked at me and hugged me closer whispering to me, "its ok, its going to be alright, you are so strong, so please just try to breathe for me?"
I tried and coughed. I watched as the relief came over my friends faces. I was still crying and unable to talk but at least i was breathing.
I stood with help from both Mia and Zoe and we slowly walked the 20m it took to cross the road.
Once across i couldn't stand anymore. My knees and calves had got the tingly feeling and i knew that if i didnt sit down soon i would collapse.
I sat down with my knees up to my chest on the edge of the pavement not caring how much room i was taking up.
I knew for certain that i would not be able to stand after this.
Mia looked at me and thank god we are best friends because she immediately knew what i needed.
"Ethan, Tess - run to maccas and get water. Olivia, Emma - make sure that they havent followed us. Marlena have 000 dialed just in case we need the police or an ambulance. Chloe take her phone and find her playlist labled 'help'. The rest of you give her space. Mhioca, can you keep breathing please?" I nodded and everyone went to work.
A man in his mid 20s walked past and stopped to ask if i needed help. Mia said that we had it covered and he nodded before saying to me, "stay strong, you have all these amazing friends who are here to support you."
I lost all feeling from my hips down.
They continued trying to comfort me before two youth workers from the center across the road told me to go with them and they will help. My friends asked if they could come and when the workers said no they started protesting. Eventually they were allowed to come and besides, i couldn't walk. Zoe and Mia carried me over to the center where i lay on a sofa and a blanket was placed over me.
Ethan and Tess ran in with water for me and all my friends (between them they were carrying enough water for 15 people)
One of the youth workers asked me if i knew what was happening.  I nodded but i couldn't speak.
Mia took over explaining the homophobes and that I was having a panic attack of sorts which was triggered by the memories that the homophobes brought back.
Zoe was helping me drink and Chloe was playing MCR as loud as she could from my phone.
I had slowly started to calm down just enough so i could speak.
The woker asked me my name, age, school and who i lived with. I was able to answer all these questions. He then asked what i thought lead to my panic attack (he confirmed that it was one). I explained a tiny bit of my bullying story and all my friends were silent the entire time. The only person who knew about the bullying was Mia.
Slowly the feeling came back to my hands and feet and eventually i was calm enough to eat something.
He asked if this had happened before and i couldn't bring myself to answer so i looked at Mia, thank god for best friends.
"Yes 4 times."
"Have you been there with her those other times?"
"I have been there once in person and twice over the phone."
"Do you know if she has any anxiety things?"
*she replied im just not going to write what the answer was*
"Ok. Has she spoken to anyone?"
"Only me."
The questioning continued until i was no longer crying and i could stand if i was leaning on someone.
We started slowly walking around the center so my legs went back to normal.
I felt so bad for ruining our day out but my friends didn't care.
"We care that we know this about you now and that we can help you in the future. You are a goddess to have recovered so well." Thanks Miki.
Once my breathing was back to normal and i could stand on my own they all looked at me before forming a massive group hug.
The one thing they all wanted to know was 'is our otp real?' Their otp being me and mia. I laughed before telling them that we are just friends. To be honest they all looked kinda disappointed.

So yeah, thats my story. Its up to you if you believe it or not.
What im trying to say is that you have no idea of the support you have even if you think you have none. Don't let things get so bad that you break down like i did because that is scary af.

Stay safe. Take care of yourself. Be nice to each other. I will update soon :)