Don't let the every day ghoul stiff you out of a proper afterlife.
Where do monsters go when they die? Monster Mortuary is a fully illustrated look into the final goodbye of all the creepy-crawly nightmares we're afraid to let out of our closets...
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EARLIER THIS WEEK, an unknown goblin of estimated age, died at 7 Lazarus Road while attempting to, yet again, steal lawn ornaments from the front yard. Neighbors reported residents, Jane and Jerry Dalton, had heavily salted their property in an attempt to deter further theft. Coroner agreed, the John Doe—called The Gnome Knapper by the city—suffered a fatal, sodium overdose. Police are not pressing charges.
The tallied number of ornaments stolen by the Knapper over a 10-decade span is close to 1,500. Police are working to determine where he kept them. A "Who Stole Your Gnome" website has been launched, to help reunite owners with their abducted gnomes. Victims of the goblin are encouraged to post pictures of their gnomes, to aid with identification when the stash is uncovered.
A viewing will be held this evening at 7 p.m. at the Monster Mortuary, 1313 Mockingbird Lane, for anyone who would like to have a commemorative photo taken with this infamous bandit. $10 a bulb.
⚰ A/N: O-bit of a rude one, stealing gnomes. This was 10/5/16 on Instagram (username: untroubledheart). Please, for the sake of missing lawn ornaments everywhere, don't forget to vote!
Thank you for reading!
*post-script: don't forget the click the illustration in the app for a closer view of our dearlydeparted monsters!
