pyromania // phan

2

what dan found particular about the regular wednesday morning was that it was a little cloudier than usual.

england is always cloudy, yet for some reason today seemed cloudier. or maybe it was foggier. either way, it made everything seem a bit dismal. the streets seemed slower, the people seemed a bit quiet.

there was a little bit of rain pattering against dan's window as dan sat up in his bed, looking around with half-open eyes. it was dan's favorite kind of morning, when there was light rain and the sky was filled with clouds, which again was normal for england.

dan dragged himself out of bed, clad in only his boxers. He shivered from the sudden wave of cold air rushing into his body, and he grabbed a pair of trainers and a shirt and put them on.

he walked into the kitchen, making a bowl of cereal, and getting a plain black lighter out of a drawer. he got a scented candle- vanilla scented, mind you- and brought it all to his small dining space which was a small square table with one chair on each side.

he set the cereal down to the side of him and set the candle and lighter down in front of him, sitting in a chair. the curtains were already drawn, so dan was okay with no fear of anyone watching, as his small and quaint apartment was located in a very urban area.

he breathed slowly, feeling a feeling of anticipation and wanting stirring up inside of him. he held the lighter, his thumb steady on the little wheel on the top of the lighter. the feeling of longing filled his fingers. and there was also another feeling he couldn't pinpoint. it took dan a moment and he finally realized.

need.

the feeling was need.

dan finally flicked his thumb on the little wheel onto the button below it and a flame protruded from the top of the lighter. dan instantly sighed in relief just from seeing the fire, lights lighting up as the fire lit up the dining room space. the feeling of the fire from the lighter alone was enough to make dan sigh with satisfaction.

then after a few moments of serenity between him and the fire, dan tilted his hand down toward the candle, and he let the flame play with the top of the candle, before the flame caught on to the stick. the flame got a little bit bigger, burning a bit more prominently now that it wasn't held within a small object.

dan became mesmerized as he dropped the lighter, watching the flame with a certain interest that only jesus himself could explain. he felt dignified, almost prideful that he had succumbed to the want. to the need. the need to start fires and burn things.

dan put his hand over the fire, easing his hand down on the candle. he then watched as the flame began to tease dan's palm, dancing upon it. dan craved the singeing feel of the fire against his skin. dan moved the hand forward, exposing his wrist to the fire. he pulled his wrist onto it, wincing a little as the flames licked his wrist, leaving tiny burn marks lashed across the veins visible through the skin.

dan repeated the process for the other arm and proceeded to play with the fire. this was a morning ritual. he doesn't necessarily like to call it that, but that was what it was.

almost an hour later, he finally blew the fire out, staying still for a moment and watching the smoke billow off of the candle before putting the lid on it to make sure the flame was gone.

dan wouldn't want any accidents to happen from the fire.

he got up and put the candle in the center of the table, and threw his soggy cereal away. he looked at his lighter for a while before placing it back into the drawer it came from, gently shutting it back.

now that his nerves were down, he was ready for the day.

•••
i know that was a really bad chapter but i really wanted to kind of set in what dan does and kind of how it makes him a pyro, ya know?

-kay xx