Secrets, Fights & Love - Yoully OneShots

I Still Feel Your Presence With Me Pt.2

~ 4 weeks before ~

After that phone call, all my hopes slipped away. I didn't know what to do with myself. I felt my belly kick me. At least he's still here.

I grabbed my bag and headed to the hospital. To see his face before they take him away.

Tears rolling down my cheeks as I stepped into his ward. All the doctors and nurses around me had depressed faces as they walked away from his room.

I let myself in and the first thing I saw was his body. It had been wrapped with blue plastic so I couldn't see his insides.

I walked up to his face. I carefully caressed his quite faded beard as tears were uncontrollably coming down.

Silence was the only thing wafting in the room. I trailed my fingers until it reached his hand. I couldn't take it no more.

I knelt on the floor and covered my face. Tears wouldn't stop running out. But his life stopped.

"Yousef I need you" I whispered as I got back up and looked at his face. Eyelids shut and never to be opened again.

I placed my hand on my already huge belly as I walked out, not wanting to leave him. My eyes wandered to reach for my phone. I scrolled through my contacts until I found his parents.

"Hello Lilly how are you?"

I didn't reply. Only sobbed. She said hello again and I kept on weeping. His mothers voice remained me of him.

"Lilly! Did you lose the child? I'm ever so sorry" She said through the phone with great sympathy.

"It's not that" I managed to say through my tears.

"Then what is it my daughter?" Yousef's mom likes me to call her mom and she likes to call me her daughter.

"You-Yousef is gone" I screamed my last word as more tears came. She gasped and I could feel her tears through the phone.

"What. My son!" She cried and started wailing in Arabic. "What had happened" She asked without trying to break down over the phone.

"Cancer got him. Again." She joined me and started crying through the phone.

"This stupid cancer. Always getting to families" She cursed and ended the call. I got to my car and wiped my tears but more kept coming.

Lauren and Alex had came over to comfort me but I just wanted to be alone. I could be around people until I calmed down. It was all just too much for me.

To lose your husband is like losing a piece of you. Losing half of you. That part that brought immense joy to your life and kept your head up in those bad days.

Half of me was torn away from me...

I sat on the couch and looked through photos of us. My eyes became glassy as I looked back at all those times we had shared and those times had come to an end. I looked at my belly and softly rubbed it.

But only if he could see you I thought as I grabbed another tissue for myself.

~