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Chapter fifty eight

"Have I told you how beautiful you look today?" Jace asks kissing my hand as he drives.
It's comforting to be back in familiar places in his big four by four, I blush like always when he is so sweet to me.
"I'm not sure you have" I answer.
"Unforgivable, sorry Angel. You are so gorgeous, those lips of yours have been driving me crazy all morning. I'm tempted to pullover right now and get you in the back of my truck" Jace tells me with a flirty smirk.
"Jay.. I'm in old worn out jeans and a tank top, I've got no makeup on and my hair is just thrown back in a messy bun. This look is anything but gorgeous, but thank you anyway" I lean across and kiss his cheek.
His hand grabs my face and he turns to kiss me hard, holy shit balls! I pull away gasping and turn his head back to the road.
"Drive Masters" I order him and he laughs at me.
"You started it baby, I warned you about those lips" he shrugs and drives with a smug smile on his face.
I stare at him wondering if I will ever get used to this, he's always so happy and smiling and it's definitely not even close to what I've ever had before. Our children will love his playful side, I can see Jace playing and making them laugh for hours. I can see our whole life, if I don't fuck this up it will be amazing. If I don't fuck this up we will die together, old and grey with big smiles on our faces.
I better not fuck it up.

"What are you thinking about over there?" Jace flicks his eyes to me still watching him.
"I didn't know your fathers name was Jason, are you named after him? When we say our vows it that the name they will call you?" I ask curiously.
"My fathers name was Jason Michael Masters, mum wanted to name me after him but he hated the thought of adding junior or the the second after my name so they compromised. Jase was his nickname so they changed the s for a c and I got Jace, sometimes people assume it's short for Jason but it doesn't bother me. I wonder if mum knew she would lose him, that some part of him would live on in his name?" He tells me casually like we are talking about names of peanut butter.
"Can I ask how he died?" I ask cautiously.
"Angel, you can ask me anything about anything. Never hesitate if something is on your mind" he smiles at me.
"I don't really know if this is a sensitive subject" I shrug.
"We're talking about a stranger, like someone I've only read about. It's a sad story but it feels like it's not mine. He went out with the boys one night, nothing out of the ordinary and just to the local bar after work. He called mum to tell her he was coming home, asked if she would like anything on the way. Being pregnant the answer was always yes, he was going to stop for ice cream. He must of been in a hurry because two blocks over he ran a red light, hit a truck. Mum told us he died instantly but when I was thirteen I got curious, I looked into it. He died three weeks later in hospital when she turned off life support, he never woke up. It was just one of those split second decisions we make everyday hoping for the best, he wasn't so lucky" Jace gives me a sad smile.
"Oh god poor May" my hands automatically cover my stomach, I couldn't even imagine the pain she felt or the guilt.
"She never talks about him anymore, I think that was for your benefit this morning" he smiles and places a hand over mine.
I lift mine up and trap it between my belly and my hands. A tear falls onto my cheek at the thought of losing Jace before he ever gets to meet our babies.
"I'm so sorry for the loss your family suffered, did Clair have a hard time with it?"
"For a while when she hit puberty and hormones kicked in, she was old enough to understand mum wouldn't have asked for ice cream if she wasn't pregnant. She felt like he died because of her.... but life goes on with or without us, we all had to move on too" he explains. "Milkshake?" Jace asks parking the car.
This is not where I'd expect us to pick up groceries but maybe Jace has a store he likes over this side of town. There is still so much we don't know about each other and everyday I learn something else I love about him.
"Sure" I answer a little confused at the abrupt change of subject.
Jace comes round to open my door and he's a little distant, lost in thought maybe? I take his hand and we walk along the path in front of the little shops, I wonder what it is he needs here?