Elena/Rebekah - The Vampire Diaries - GirlXGirl

~ I'm Sorry ~

Author's Note:

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Chapter Eight

Rebekah's POV

Rebekah has been patiently awaiting Elena's return. She is getting better and better at listening and dreaming at the same time. The skill wasn't perfected, but it was getting close. She kept having to remid herself to dream. It was hard though, she didn't want to miss Elena. Last time Elena was there, she talked about how she was beginning to wonder if it was all worth it. Elena was saying that maybe she should just give up on the world. It has most certainly given up on her. She was saying that it wasn't worth it. So many people had died that Elena was just tired of it all. She wants the few people who are left to live happily. Of course Rebekah wanted to scream at Elena. Rebekah knows where Elena is at. It is a dark, lonely place. Rebekaj wishes Elena would undagger her, even if just for a few minutes. She doesn't want Elena to die. It may be selfish, but Rebekah doesn't want to lose Elena. Elena is the only one who has ever cared for her.

Rebekah is in the middle of a nightmare when she hears the sound of wood scraping across the floor. She hears Elena sit down and then listens as she takes a few breathes. Rebekah hears Elena fiddle with the latch and then watches as she opens the coffin. Elena's face comes into view, she is smiling, thankfully.
"Hey Rebekah. Niklaus finally left. He went to turn some vampires into hybrids." Elena says with a shrug as she rests her arms on the coffin. Elena takes a long breath as she looks around. Rebekah wonders what Elena is thinking. Has something good happened since the last time Elena spoke to her.
"I think Stefan and Damon are beginning to realize that I don't love them." Elena says with a smile as she stares at Rebekah's face, "I hope they can forgive me one day...."
Elena's face falls for just a second before it bounces up again, "Jeremy called today. He is doing well, making friends and everything. He says he barely has time to call! I'm so happy for him." Elena says, though her voice shakes towards the end. Elena sits still for a while, just staring at Rebekah with furrowed brows.
"Something strange happened today." Elena says as her eyes become curious, "Alaric was wandering through the house with blood on his hands... When I asked him about it, he said he didn't know where it came from."
She runs her hand through her hair as she sighs, "Probably some supernatural torment about to blow up in my face." She says almost angrily. Rebekah watches as Elena stares at the end of her coffin for a few minutes. Elena's eyes are almost black when she is angry. The normally chocolate brown turns dark. Rebekah worries as Elena's eyes tear up slighty and she shakes her head. She does that a few times before she begins to bite her lip. Elena looks down at her lap before looking up and shaking her head.
"I couldn't have been that bad, right?" She asks as her tears swell, "I must have done something horrible to deserve all this.... Pain."
Rebekah's heart stings as she watches Elena slowly break down, "Around the time my parents died. That must have been when it happened. I must have done something then. That was when all of... this, started." Elena says as she gestures around herself, "It was a long stream of events that lead me deeper into the darkness."
Elena's looks as if she is about to break into tears. Rebekah has never felt so helpless than she does right now. She is begging Elena to reach forward and pull the dagger from her chest. Rebekah knows she can help Elena. One way or another.
"Everyone dies around me. It is only a matter of time before Jeremy gets hurt. I sent him away, but I know something will happen. I can feel it. No matter what I do, something always happens. I just can't take it." Elena says as tears swell in her eyes, "I know I can end it all."
Rebekah wants to scream and argue with Elena, but she is just a statue. 'Come on Rebekah. You have been daggered so many times, you must be building up some sort of immune system.' Rebekah thinks as she tries to move her limbs. Though it is of no use, a vampire cannot build an immune system for the whiteoak. It is her kryptonite. She keeps fighting as Elena breaks into pieces.
"At least if I killed myself I wouldn't have to worry about the best way to break Stefan's heart.... That would be giving up, though, right? I'm not a quitter, and I don't want to die..." Elena says, trying to reason with herself, "No. I'm not giving up. Killing myself would save so many other lives. Niklaus has enough of my blood to build a hybrid army if he wants to. So he won't hurt anyone."
Tears are streaming down Elenas face at this point and she is practically sobbing. She is no longer talking to Rebekah, but to herself. Trying to convince herself to keep living, but failing miserably. Elena stands and kicks the stool in a pit of rage. Rebekah listens as it crashes against the wall on the other side of the room.
"I don't know what to do!" She shouts as her hands fly into her hair and yank it around, "It hurts so much."
Rebekah listens helplessly as Elena's rage jumps and then plummets as her pain takes over. Rebekah is shocked as Elena's hand suddenly grips the dagger. Elena stares at her hand with temptation.
"Maybe just for a while. I need you. You can help." She says as her hand grips the dagger tightly. She contemplates it for a few more minutes while Rebekah screams, 'YES!' In her head. She will gladly allow Elena to dagger her again. She just has to help Elena.
"No. I can't." Elena says as she releases the dagger. Rebekah listens as Elena walks across the room and picks up the stool before walking back towards Rebekah. Elena places the stool on the floor and sits on it again. She stares forwards for a while, allowing tears to stream down her face.

When Elena finally moves, it is to clean her face. She wipes underneath her eyes until her cheeks are red and then leans over Rebekah, "I'll visit again before I make a final decision." Elena says before placing her hand on Rebekah's shoulder and then kissing her cheek. Rebekah clings to the tingling sensation rushing through her her body as she watches Elena close her coffin and then listens as she quietly leaves the room.

Rebekah fights the white oak as she waits for Elena's return. She must overcome it. Elena's life depends on it.

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The minutes seem to tick by like years as Rebekah waits for Elena's next words. Rebekah's mind is flipped into chaos. Freaking out about everything. Worrying about Elena. She should be back by now, right? Rebekah is beginning to think that she is gaining control of her body again, but she isn't sure. That could be a dream. It could all be fake. This could all be fake. Everything Elena said could've been a dream. The small thought gives Rebekah a small glimmer of hope, but not much. The darkness is so unsettleing. Where is she? She said she would come back before she made her final descision. She has to come back. She said she would.

Those thoughts keep repeating in Rebekah's head until she hears a door slam. She might've jump if she could have. Rebekah listens closely as she hears slow footsteps walking through the house. Why couldn't she hear the footsteps before? She listens as they drag on till they finally stop in front of her door. They footsteps turn slowly before dragging closer. There is almost a sloshing sound, as if the person is wet. The stool drags across the wooden floor before stopping in front of Rebekah's coffin. Rebekah has a sinking feeling about this next moment.

She waits impatiently as Elena stares at the latch before finally opening the coffin. The coffin makes and awful screech, as if it has been in a deserted area for too long. Elena leans over Rebekah and Rebekah can tell that it must be raining outside. The room must be very dark, because even as the coffin opens, no light shines in. She probably had to wait till Klaus went to sleep.
"Um." Elena says with a shaky voice. Rebekah knows at that moment that something terrible. At the same time, she notices that her eyes are closed and that she only knew Elena was wet because of the water drops dripping onto her skin. She could feel. Rebekah's mind buzzes as she fights to open her eyes, to send some kind of signal to Elena.
"Alaric is dead." Elena says as she breaks down into tears, "His ring made him crazy- and Esther turned him into an original."
Rebekah is shocked, Elena has lost another person? How? What?
"Your mom linked me to Alaric. If I died, he died." Elena says and Rebekah can hear the stool rock back and forth, "Matt accidently drove us off the bridge when some kid walked into the road. I died."
Rebekah fights to open her eyes and can just barely see Elena's face. Tears are streaming down her face and her hair is soaked through.
"Stefan saved me." Elena yells through anger, "I told him to save MATT!"
"It did no good anyways. I died for a few minutes... They say I came back. Alaric didn't... and neither did Matt." Elena says bitterly, "They just left him to die. They let him drown. As if saving me would do any good. Those idiots."
Rebekah feels her eyes watering up as she watches Elena scream through the air. So much pain.
"I won't allow this to happen to Jeremy. He is so happy. I won't tell him. I don't care." Elena says as she hugs herself, "I keep telling myself that if I end it all, then saing my life was useless... But it was useless anyways! Only more will die."
Rebekah feels her fingers twitch, almost there.
"Your brother is currently hidden. I couldn't stop them. They wouldn't listen to a word I said. They insisted that I live my life freely..." Elena says as she stares through the darkness. The moonlight is barely lighting the room.
"I'm not free. No one is. Everyone is dying and it is all my fault. I wish I had never been born." Elena says before sinking into her head for a moment, "I saw Matt. He was so scared. I told him to save Matt!"
Rebekah's heart screams as Elena screams and throws the stool through the window, creating a loud crash. Rebekah actually feels the cold air on her skin.
"I'm going to do it, Rebekah." Elena says as she leans over Rebekah again. Rebekah begs Elena with her eyes as Elena stares into them.
"I hope you can't hear me, Rebekah. I hope that when you wake up, you think I am a traitor. I don't want you to miss me. I don't want anyone to. I'll only ever bring death." She says sadly. Elena leans down a kisses Rebekah's forehead, holding there for just a moment.
"I'm sorry for leaving you. I'll end it... I'll end it where it began." Elena whispers before gently shutting the coffin. Rebekah listens, horrified as Elena walks from the room once more.

"Wait." She whispers, too late.