"come on, lilly! we have to watch your daddy take off in the rocket ship!" i said, making a poof noise.
"okay, mommy. let me get my blankie." lilly said, then walked toward the couch and sat down with me.
i flipped through the channels until i found the 'nasa' channel.
'And here we see, the first rocket ship to mars!' I heard the TV anchor shout.
Whoops, claps and cheers filled the room.
"C'mon, Ethan. You can do this." I said quietly, and squeezed my daughters hand.
"Mommy." Lilly said.
"Hush, honey."
"Mommy!" She said more impatiently.
"Shh," I said.
"It's talking off!"
"Mommy!" She screamed.
"What, Lilly?!"
"It's going to crash!"
"No it's not, Lilly."
"Yes it is! Look, look!"
I looked at the TV,
"No it's not, Lil-"
boom.
"Mommy?" Lilly said.
Chaos filled the room, I sat there, stunned.
Ethan.
"Ethan," I said quietly.
"Ethan!" I screamed, cupping my mouth and sobbing.
"Oh my god! Oh my god,"
All you could hear were my big, heavy sobs.
"Mommy! What's happening?"
"Grandmas gonna take you, okay?" I choked out.
"There's been an accident! Shut it down, turn off the program!"
The TV shouted, and it clicked off.
"Ethan!" I screamed.
My heart.
"Oh, I can't breathe!"
And I sobbed.
I sobbed for hours.
Until I finally got a phone call.
"Hello?"
"Natalia?" Ethan croaked.
"Ethan! Oh my god-"
"Baby, you have to listen to me."
"Yes, yes okay! Anything,"
"I'm gonna die out here, I can guarantee it. I want you to go. Take care of Lilly. Maybe I'll survive. I'll find you. But don't wait for me, dear lord, please don't wait for me. Find love. Be happy. And if I do pass, I'll be watching over you. I love you, Natalia."
"Ethan, wait!"
Click.
"The number you're trying to reach has been disconnected-"
"No!"
I smashed the phone on the ground.
I sobbed and pulled my hair and screamed.
"Why? Are you even up there? How could you let this happen?!" I shouted.
"What did I do?! What I ever do to deserve this kind of pain?!"
My heart didn't even feel like it was there.
Two years had passed.
I heard a knock on my door.
"What the hell-"
"Natalia?"
"Ethan?"
----
holy shit maybe I'll make a story out of this????
