"y/n, you never seem to fucking listen to me anymore!"
"why do i have to listen to you? you're not my dad." you say, before putting a blunt to your lips.
ethan grabs your wrist and takes the blunt from you, throwing it in the trash.
"what the fuck ethan? do you know how much that costs?!"
"it's illegal, y/n! this isn't you! what happened? why can't you talk to me?!"
"shut the fuck up with your bullshit. i'm perfectly fine, you're just so uptight and needy and don't let me do anything! have some fun for once in your life, grandpa!"
"bullshit! bull fucking shit. you're the one trying to kill yourself, i'm trying to save you because you're all i have left!" he says, his voice breaking.
ethan lost grayson a while ago, little did he know it affected you too.
"you don't even have me anymore ethan."
the words escaped from your lips without thinking.
no.
that's wrong, that's not true.
ethan stands there, stunned.
"y-y/n?"
"ethan, i can't fucking do this anymore. i can't."
"please. please you can't leave. i'm sorry, i truly am. please, by god just don't leave me."
you sit down and put your head in your hands.
"do you really want to know what's wrong?"
"yes, baby."
you take a deep breath.
"i, um. i was recently diagnosed with depression."
ethan gasps and starts to say something, but you cut him off.
"sh, that's not all. i can't have children."
silence and tension float throughout the air.
"y/n, i'm so sorry. i had no idea."
"it's okay."
ethan grabs your hand and rubs your thumb.
"it'll be okay, we can make it."
"but what if we can't ethan?"
you stand up and rip away from him.
"what if i die? what if we break up? what if i go fucking insane? what then?"
"don't say that."
"i just did. and i will say it again. we will not last."
"if you think of it that way we won't! be more optimistic, y/n!"
"i can't, ethan. i can't be happy. i will never be happy."
silence once again.
"i love you, y/n."
"i love you too, ethan." you say, as you gather your things and quietly leave the apartment.
