Help Me

Dear Insanity

All she did was sit there. It had been two days since Omega’s death, one since Alpha woke up, but she had stayed on the forsaken couch the whole time. He hated her and her pity. She made him want to kill, to let himself be taken over by that insanity.  He couldn’t stand her any longer. It didn’t matter anyways because she was too far gone into that world that he had dragged her into.

It was hard trying to think of the best way to get ride of her. One reason was he didn’t want to mess up his lovely loft when someone else was going to rent it out. Two, he didn’t want someone to think anything was going on. Three, he did not want the others to know until it was over, over and done with.

Izaya just watched her as she ignored the basic needs of life. For three days now she had not went to the bathroom, took a shower, ate, or drank...anything. She was killing herself and that just pissed Izaya off. He was supposed to kill her for God’s sake not herself! This was going to be a pain!

I could see Izaya watching me. It was annoying and slightly scary. He look so, so, so focused, too focused. He knew what he had done too, that jerk! I say this but I know that it doesn’t matter; I love him too much to be this, this disturbed, angry, whatever I’m supposed to call it! Can I handle it though, that is the question.

He will either toss me out into the world or he will take me back to that hell hole. I will not allow that even I will fight him back! His eyes seem to be burning holes into me, what do I do, what do I do?!

“Izaya, what are you doing?” I asked cautiously. Hopefully he was not going to lose his sanity for a split second.

“And she speaks! I’m staring at you pitiful self, of course. I made you kill your brother yet you seem fine other than the fact of the mental insanity you are feeling. This is why you just piss me off. I can’t seem to get you angry at me no matter how much I try. I have tried a lot mind you. What if I said I’m the one who got your parents killed in the car crash that left their bodies undistinguishable? What if I said I was the one who had them sent to America just so they could be killed, what would you do? Hah, just kidding!” Izaya watched me with intensity, waiting to see any reaction I had. All I did was clutch my fist. That was all he was going to get out of me.

He stood and grabbed his jacket and left with out saying anything else. It was really odd. I had almost lost my face. I almost attacked him but I must not let on anything, it’s either die or have a chance of getting out alive. All I can do is hope that I will get out alive.

I stood from the couch and took a good look around the loft. I never really took time to and I wanted to get up anyways to get something to eat. Izaya’s bedroom had nothing exceptional about it. A small book caught my attention, it looked warn, not as if it was used a lot but more like the owner did not take care of it. I flipped through it reading all the thoughts Izaya had about his murders. I soon got bored; I didn’t care about the other deaths. I only care about ones that relate to me.

I walked into the kitchen and saw a knife. I picked it up and thought about how great it would feel to run it down his creamy white flesh. How it would feel as it gently broke the skin and go deeper as it went down, down, down. I couldn’t keep the smile off my face as I thought this but then something hit me, it would be too messy.

I opened the medicine cabinet and looked though the bottles. I read the instructions and drug facts finding ones that could easily be slipped into his drink. Oh the face he would make! The terror that would show would make me laugh! Laugh till I couldn’t breath and fell over!

I took time to crush them up and put them into a cup of tea with no sugar. I smirked I could see him foaming at he mouth as he overdosed. He would gasp and wheeze and I would stand there looking over him, laughing at his discomfort and or pain! I started laughing and snorting loudly as I couldn’t hold it in anymore.