We Broke Up | Jungkook

23

TWENTY THREE

I started walking soullessly on the sidewalk. I think I hit a point in life where I'm just done. I cried, I fought, I tried but everything is crashing down. My demons are screaming louder, trying to eat away the rest of me.

And this time, I'm not going to fight back.

•••

I've been staying in my room and crying for two days now. I didn't reply Jungkook's texts and I didn't answer his call.

I just don't know what to do anymore beside laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling the whole time.

No communications, no talking, no eating, just nothing. All I did was crying my lungs out.

I know that it's not going to be any better when I do this but I just can't think of any solution anymore. It's really over.

I sighed, waking up from my bed and wiped my tears away. I reached out for my phone to see that there are lots and lots of messages and calls from Jungkook.

I felt so guilty now for not picking up his calls and replying his messages but I just couldn't bring myself to. We're on the verge of breaking up.

I unlocked my phone and clicked on Kakao Talk. There were unread messages from a complete introvert girl in my class.

"Kim Haena..." She sent me that message two days ago. I scrolled down to see a lot of screenshots from a group chat which I have never known about.

I clicked on a photo to see Hyemin, Risa and basically, their squad were chatting about bringing me down. Believe it or not, Hyemin was the one who started all of this.

Hyemin... was the one who took the photos. She was the one who posted them into social medias. She was the one who started telling everyone that I'm dating with Jungkook. She even created a lot of accounts to bash me.

She acted like she didn't know about me and him. In fact, she's the one behind all of this. I'm just... speechless. She's doing all of this because she simply wants to be with him. Haha right, I totally forgot that she's head over heels in love with him.

Just why? I fucking trusted you.

Seeing this isn't making me any better. She's been planning this all along. And yet, I'm so fucking dumb and stupid to trust her.

I started typing hopelessly. "Shinhye... Where did you get all of this?"

She read my message immediately. "I don't know. I think they were mistaken, they added me into their group."

Just as I was about to reply her, Insun unnie called me. I cleared my throat and wiped my tears away in an instant.

I picked it up. "Un..Unnie?"

"Haena... About fifteen minutes ago, I saw Jungkook bursted outside PD-nim room, running in a fast pace. I think that the director told him about it." She said worriedly.

Jungkook...

Before I could say anything, I heard my house's bell ringing. It can't possibly be....

"Haena? Haena?" I heard Insun unnie calling me on the phone, but my entire body couldn't seem to function well anymore. I dropped my phone from my hand, walking slowly and shakily to the door.

The bell kept ringing and in that instant, I unlocked the door to see Jungkook standing in front of me with his eyes filled with unshed tears.

My hand that rested on the doorknob started to shake rapidly. "Jung.. Jung.."

He pulled me into a hug quickly. "Haena... Haena... Haena.. Haena," He kept calling me, crying and kissing my hair. I hugged him back strongly, inhaling his fragrance that I've missed for so long. I bursted out crying on the spot.

Jungkook, I miss you so much.

"Baby, don't cry," He released our hug, using his thumbs to wipe my tears away. "Tears don't suit you," He added and I nodded, smiling as a response.

I closed the door and we started walking to the living room. We sat down on the couch, heaving a sigh simultaneously.

Then again, my tears forcefully came out even though I didn't want them to. "Hey... Jungkook—" Just as I was about to talk to him about our problem, he draped his arm around my shoulders and moved my head slightly to rest on his shoulder.

He started to caress my hair slowly. "It's okay, I know," He said as soft as whispers.

I just wish that this moment would last forever.

"I'm so sorry, you've been suffering a lot because of me," He apologized, still caressing my hair.

"N-No.. It's all because of me," I objected, wiping my tears away. "BTS is just getting more popular and yet I almost ruined their entire thing."

"Pabo yah? It's not your fault," Seriously, by just hearing his voice soothed me so much. "I mean, the person who started the whole thing wrote the article wrongly. So, people started to think about this negatively,"

Yeah, fuck you, Hyemin.

Whatever the reason is, I still think that he's better off without me.

"Hmm, what to do now?" I asked and he stopped caressing my hair. I heard him sighing in pain.

We stayed in the same position, without uttering any words. I'm satisfied by just hearing his heavy breathing and his heart beating. And yet, I'm trembling in fear that this moment will fade away.

His hand fell down to rest on my lap and I placed my hand on his hand instinctively.

"Jungkook... We broke up, right?" I asked him through my tightened throat and teary eyes while resting my head on his shoulder and caressing the back of his palm slowly.

For a moment out there, he released me from his embrace. He drew me very close to himself, so that I was forced to look directly into his eyes. His eyes flashed so much of grief, sadness and sorrow but the worst thing is, he managed to smile. A very weak smile.

Jungkook, you don't have to smile if you can't.

For a few seconds, he leaned in, tilting his face slowly. Soon, his lips started to connect with mine in that instant causing me to flinch back at first, but he used both of his hands to cup my cheeks with so much comfort. He moved his lips very slowly and gently, running his fingers through my hair.

My tears started falling even harder because the kiss just felt so sad. Still, I kissed him back without hesitation. I miss the feeling of having his soft lips on mine. I miss him so much, I really miss us.

He finally broke the kiss, looking at me with the tip of his nose brushing against mine. "T-That's right... I'm sorry," He finally responded, using his thumbs to wipe my tears away.

That's right, we broke up.