Our Little Love Story *NOW PUBLISHED ON AMAZON KINDLE!!*

chapter twenty five

“Jared,” I began, choking back a sob, “you can’t. I mean, what if you get sent off? What if---” I couldn’t bring myself to say it. I didn’t even want to think about it. What if he got….killed?

To my surprise, Jared let out a small laugh. I looked at him, my eyes wide in amazement. “I probably will get deployed. And I realize the dangers of being deployed. A lot of people have died protecting the freedom of our country…” he began.

“You sound like a damn billboard,” I interrupted quietly, sulking in the passenger’s seat.

“Look, sweetie, I’m sorry. But I really feel like this is what I was meant to do. Get out of this small town. Move on to bigger and better things,” Jared explained. His words hurt. They hurt a lot.

“So I guess there’s nothing--or no one-- for you here?” I asked, insulted. 

“Tiff, that’s not what I meant. I just meant that--” he began, but I cut him off again.

“It doesn’t matter, Jared. Just forget it. Do what you want,” I spat at him. I knew I was acting like a child and was being very selfish, but at that moment, I didn’t care. “We need to get back to school,” I added, motioning towards the clock on his radio. He glanced at the time, and pulled the gearshift into drive with a sigh.

“Look,” Jared started again, watching the road, “I didn’t want to tell you. I figured that you wouldn’t like the idea. But, well, I want to do it. I really do,” Jared pulled into a parking space, back in the school’s parking lot. I sat and stared at him, unsure of what to say.

“But, but what about---us?” I asked, still feeling incredibly selfish. I couldn’t help it.

“I know, and that’s why I didn’t want to tell you. We’ll be okay. We can get through this, I know it,” Jared leaned over and placed his hands on the sides of my face and looked closely into my eyes. “I love you, Tiff. More than anything. But you have to understand that this is what I really want to do with my life. I want to dedicate my life to my country. I, I just don’t know how to exactly explain how I feel about it. I just know that this is what I was meant to do with my life.” I didn’t say anything in response. I just let the tears that had welled up in my eyes overflow onto my cheeks. Jared wiped at my tears with his thumbs, and pulled me close. I let the sobs free, and my body shook with emotion.

“I, I just feel--I just feel like--” I stammered between sobs. “I just feel like I’m losing you,” I rushed out with a deep breath.

“You’re not losing me. We’ll be alright, I swear it,” Jared answered softly. He held me back a little ways to look into my eyes, “I swear it,” he repeated. The bell to go to class sounded outside the school, interrupting us again. Wiping my face, I opened the door and climbed out of the SUV. 

We walked quietly into school, the weight of Jared’s ‘career choice’ heavy on my mind. A small, teeny voice inside my head was hoping that he would change his mind. That Jared would just graduate high school, and then attend four years of college like everyone else. But ever since that terrible day in New York, so many young Americans were gung-ho to join the military and protect the freedom we had grown to know and love. The louder voice in my head, the one that I didn’t want to listen to, was saying that this is what he was going to do, whether I liked it or not. I didn’t want to admit it, but I already knew deep down that the louder of the two ‘voices’ was right.