Wherever You Are

Fourteen: The Broken Barrier

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I sat in Jack's dining room, staring out into the white windows that I had yet to lay a finger on. My mind raced, but not like it usually did. Tonight, I thought about Jack, but in a much different way than what I was used to. The pain was still there from his disappearance fifteen years ago, but the hole in my heart seemed to be filling up a bit each day I spent with him.

I sighed, leaning back more into the leg and staring into the pure whiteness ahead of me. I still hadn't decided what I was going to do with myself. Go home and try to regain a normal life once again, if I'm not already imprisoned from Jane's accusations, or stay with Jack for as long as I'd please. The decisions were eating me from inside out, as I tried to mentally think of the good and bad of both choices.

Going home would be a good thing in the way that I could go back to my job and all those wonderful smiling faces once again. It was true in the fact that teachers cherished each and every one of their students as if it were their own. The bad, however, of going back, outweighed any good. I would have no home, since the house Luke and I lived in was technically owned by him. My family would think I'm some murderer, who went to find and kill my lost love, and would most likely throw me in jail until they had any real evidence. I would have lost nearly everything I once knew.

Staying with Jack would, in my mind, be the better choice, but the bad still echoed throughout. He had left me, and I couldn't just forgive him and run back into his arms. I also couldn't abandon my entire life above ground and nestle here instead; for if anyone figured out who I was here, I would definitely not be seeing the light for much longer.

"God, what do I do?" I groaned, standing up from the ground and slamming my hands into the white windows. My fingertips against the glass send an array of colors to fly across the windows, filling up the white with an image that my hands soon started to draw. My mind was elsewhere as my fingers took over the windows, not leaving out any details.

Taking a deep breath, I finished my drawing and stood back to watch the beautiful picture come to life. 1032 Redlynn Road, the house still looking as beautiful as I once viewed it before when Jack drew it. The moon shined down on the house, presenting its beauty even when the sky became dark. The stars, shimmered gracefully around, twinkling with every ounce they could.

"I know it's hard," I heard Jack say from the dining room entrance, making me slightly turn to him. He was changed into his nightly sweatpants and t-shirt, but instead of the many different white ones I was used to, this time it was gray. Clasped in his arms was a folded up navy blue blanket, which he held tightly to his chest. 

"Making choices never came easy. But coming from someone who has been in the same position as you, and ultimately made the wrong one, I just want to tell you its okay. It's okay to leave me and go back up to your family. I left you, my family, fifteen years ago without any trace, which was not the right choice. A family needs to be together, Charlotte, that's what they're made for," he ended, looking over to me with caring eyes.

I knew what he was talking about, that leaving my mother and father wasn't something I should do, but I took his words in a completely different way. Eyes swelling up with tears, I thought about what I considered my family, and my mom and dad never once was brought into my mind. Instead, thoughts of Jack came through...

Coming over to wrap me up in the blanket, tears strode down my eyes silently as I still looked to Jack. I didn't move, yet stood there as a stiff, fragile being that needed her family more than she ever knew before. A stiff, fragile being that needed Jack more than she ever knew before.

Wrapping me up and holding me tight, we stood as one for once, instead of two individuals that were much different than what they used to be. My hands rose to a place they hadn't been in a long, long time and came up to grab ahold of Jack's shirt to pull him closer. I could feel his arms around my waist tighten as I did, making me realize our relationship would be a much different one after this.

"Do you want to head to bed? Sometimes sleeping on a thought can help," Jack noted, making me realize how tired I actually was. Nodding, I removed myself from our embrace, and tightened the blanket around my small body. Grabbing ahold of Jack's hand that was placed out, he led me to my bedroom.

Bare feet plunking against the hard wood flooring, I got to my bed and crawled in, watching as Jack hesitated, before going over to the door and turning off the light.

"I'll see you in the morning," he whispered, almost as if he wanted to say something more, but didn't.

"Wait, don't go," I said barely above a whisper, but Jack indeed did hear, almost as if he was listening for it. "Can you uhm-" I faltered, not knowing how to stay the words I wanted to. "can you stay with-with-" I bit my lip and closed my eyes, wishing my brain could put the words into sentences that would be understandable.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" he wondered, making me softly nod and look up to him.

"At least until I fall asleep, then you can go to your bed," I replied, immediately better with my words once he had understood what I wanted. Slightly smiling, he agreed to my request, and came over to join me in bed. It was then he invited me into his arms, just like how he had fifteen years ago. Smiling, I was happy in the moment, and the world didn't matter one bit. I was with my Jack and that was all that mattered. Yes, in the morning my problems would still be there, but for the night it was almost as if they were completely gone.

Nuzzling into his arms, he wrapped them around my side and pulled me to smack into him. Giggling, I wasn't expecting him to do what he did and looked up to smile at him.

"Sorry, fifteen years without your woman really makes a man crazy," he smiled back, making me giggle once more and shake my head.

"You could have had any woman you wanted down here, I know they wouldn't have denied you," I replied with a whisper, looking up to the ceiling as I tried not to imagine any other woman with Jack.

Laughing, Jack replied, "Oh no, no woman down here comes anything close to you," he whispered back, turning my head with his free hand to face him. "No woman anywhere comes close to you," he breathed, his eyes heavy on mine while he held the back of my neck softly. Biting my lip, I couldn't stand what he was doing to me, and brought my lips to his within the second. Surprised by my actions, he faltered at first with the kiss, but soon was fully aware and fully wanting more when it ended. Pulling me back to him for more, his lips were something I had not in a long time felt against mine, and I loved every second of it.

Bringing my hands up to trace against his chest as our kisses ended, the barrier between us had most definitely been broken and I was glad...

"Well, nearly two decades later and we still have the same flare don't we?" Jack asked, laying back and holing me tight against him. Smiling, I nodded, before lowering my head down onto his chest and closing my eyes. The choice to stay or go that I was debating so long and hard on, was now just a tad easier...