Tear In My Heart; Joshler

11

"Get up.", Kelly's voice was stern as she pulled the shades back in Tyler's room. Tyler squinted his eyes and the sudden light gave him a sharp pain between his eyes.

"I don't care if you stay in the house, but you're not laying in bed all day.", She spoke. He huffed and threw the blankets off himself.

Tyler sat at the kitchen table watching his mother make coffee for the both of them. She sat his cup down in front of him and sat herself down at the table with her cup.

She sipped on her warm coffee. "We may not be on best communicating terms, because you shut yourself out from everyone. But let me be clear.", her voice became stern again. " Don't make this about you, Tyler. It's about him. He's most likely terrified and you want to be angry about something he can't control.", Kelly sipped her coffee eyeing her son. His gaze never meeting hers, he felt ashamed as he let her words sink in.

"I don't know what to even say to him, or how to act. What if i say something wrong?", Tyler spoke finally, looking at the cup of coffee as the steam rolled out and dispersed.

"Be yourself and i don't think there is a wrong thing.", Kelly still looking at him, waiting for him to look. "Let Josh take the lead, he'll let you know what he needs.", Tyler finally looked up to his mom, nodding slowly.

Before Tyler could ring the doorbell it opened wide.

"Where's Josh?", Tyler asked as he saw the Reverend's face.

"At school, where you should be.", he spoke, eyeing Tyler.

"Oh.", Tyler spoke.

-

Josh is standing on the second level of the school. Watching as all the kids leave the classrooms, he had a meeting to do in one of the classes. He started to walk as he saw most of the kids disappear, but a body running into the school and sliding his feet on the floor caught his eyes.

Tyler. Josh watched as Tyler caught himself on a locker and ran quickly to a room he passed throwing his head inside looking for something, or someone.

Josh continued watching Tyler until he stopped, Tyler stood in the middle of the hall way and soon looked up as he felt Josh's gaze on him.

Josh turns away, deciding the meeting isn't as important as he thought. He was angry and disappointed with Tyler still, and he wanted to leave.

Tyler ran after him. Trying to find the stairs, "Josh!", Tyler yelled as he turned the corner almost bumping into him.

They stare at each other, Josh's anger soon disappears as he sees how genuine and worried Tyler is. Regret, and sadness.

"I'm so sorry. I'm a coward.", Tyler speaks first not knowing if this is what he wants to hear, but it's what Tyler wants to tell him.

"I should have told you sooner.", Josh spoke holding his books tightly.

Tyler caressed Josh's cheek stepping closer to him. He missed the warmth of Josh's skin on his. "God, I'm so stupid. I made you do too many things, kept you up all nig-"

"No. The drugs just stopped working. If anything, doing things I loved with you kept me alive longer and healthy.", Josh cut Tyler off.

"Are you frightened?", Tyler asks.

"All the time.", Josh answered and closed his eyes. Breathing in heavily, trying not to cry. "I feel i have no one.", his voice wavered.

"You have me, baby..", Tyler spoke and put their foreheads together. A tear fell down Josh's face and Tyler quickly wiped it with his thumb, tracing Josh's lips with the same thumb. Their lips touched and it felt like everything would be okay. He didn't mind the salt taste of Josh's tears, he just wanted to be right there with him. Every step of the way.