What? Really! You’ve got to be joking
Is there something naughty that you’re smoking?
It’s not like you to talk such shite
How many people were in this fight?
Six you say and one was a copper
What? Really! Are you on ‘Poppers’?
One was a bouncer, totally hench
Were you asleep on a nearby bench?
You went into Karate mode; all Bruce Lee
I think you need someone to test your wee
Three of them down in one smooth move
So what did you do with the other two?
A kick and a punch and the copper was down
Weren’t there any cameras around?
And the last dude came at you with a blade
What? Really! Weren’t you afraid?
You blocked him; took him out with one punch
Did you have funny ‘Shrooms’ with your lunch?
All of this and you got away without a scratch
Oh! You used your Ninja styles; they were no match
I love your stories, they seem so real
It shows the girls your sex appeal
Makes you sound tough and so hardcore
What? Really! They don’t think you’re a bore?
Well I really must go and tell all of my mates
About these wonderful stories you love to create
We’ll all have a laugh at your own expense
Because I saw you trip over that little white fence
