I'm a Dreamer

Scars

Hey it's Jackie just a warning this might trigger a few of you. You have been warned. Love ya.

Dear journal,
She's dying. She gave up long ago and now she's dying. The only girl I've ever had a connection with,the only girl I care about,the only girl I'll ever love is dying. She is so skinny you can see every bone in her body,she's pale,bald,and dying. I don't care how skinny or pale or bald she is. She is beautiful. Ash is the most beautiful girl I've ever met and her personality is beautiful in its own way. She's got these walls that no one can break down but yet she is sensitive. She's smart and sarcastic and sweet. They put her on bed rest starting yesterday. She hates it but I know it's for the best she can barely stand up. Her mother is already planning her funeral. Her brother keeps working trying to get enough money for a surgery that might save her life. I'm watching my Ash die. I'm getting stronger every day they say I probably only have a week left in the hospital. Ash only has a week left to live. She won't talk to me she just writes all day. It's killing me. Today I started cutting. Yea yea usually you only hear about girls cutting but guys can be broken too. I plan on cutting the pain away. What else can I do ? I refuse to say goodbye because goodbye means forever and I don't want to lose her forever.
-Luke