Girl of Never : Days to Love (Chat MD Series #4)

Day 38 : Experiment

Experiment
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I was seated at my usual seat. Pinanood ko ang pagpasok ni Harry sa pinto ng common room hanggang sa pag-upo niya sa katapat ko.

Ngumiti ako sa kanya.

"Kain na, Lord Commander."

Napasulyap siya sa pwesto ko at nangunot ang noo. "Where's your food?"

"Hindi ako pwedeng kumain ngayon," sagot ko. "I'm prepping for a blood test later."

"What test?" he inquired.

"Catecholamine test."

Shock distorted his face that I got alarmed. Blood drained from his face as he looked at me. Why is he...

"Oh."

He's worried.

Catecholamine test is usually prescribed by doctors to test adrenal tumors. My chest felt so full and warm dahil lang parang nag-aalala siya sa'kin.

"I'm not taking it to check for tumors or anything. Don't worry. I'm not sick," sabi ko sa kanya at ngumiti.

Pero hindi nawala ang ngunot ng noo niya.

"Kumain ka, Lord Commander. Wala talaga akong sakit," I told him.

Hirap siya sa pagkain sa pancake. Napasimangot naman ako.

"Hindi ako pwedeng kumain para sa test mamaya. Give justice to the pancakes. Eat with gusto," sabi ko at umirap.

"Are you sure you're not sick? Why are you taking the test if you're really not sick? Who told you to take it if-"

Mahina akong natawa sa sunod-sunod na tanong niya.

"I have a little experiment going on. I'm checking my hormones," sabi ko lang at tinitigan siya.

I sighed.

Kailangan ko pa ba talagang i-test ang hormones ko? I think they're in chaos right now. Just being alone with Harry again and being this near him shoots up my adrenaline. All my senses zero-in on him-I raveled in his damp hair, his stubbled chin, and his relaxed expressions in the morning. I could smell his cologne. And if I listen closely, I could hear my heartbeat like a gong announcing the arrival of its king. The beat reverberated inside my chest.

I sighed. Again. Just because he's damn beautiful in the morning. Partida, may jet lag pa siya at mukhang stressed.

I took my phone and opened the camera.

"Harry, tingin ka nga sa'kin," I told him.

Pag-angat niya ng mata sa'kin, I pressed the capture button.

"What are you doing?"

"I took your picture," nakangiting sabi ko habang nakatingin sa picture niyang nakatingin sa'kin.

"Bakit?"

"I need it," sabi ko lang. I captured another one habang nakatingin pa rin siya. Bakit madali siyang i-capture ng camera? May gusto ba ang camera phone ko sa kanya?

"Hey!"

"Smile ka nga," sabi ko sa kanya. Baka ikamatay ng camera ko kapag ngumiti siya bigla.

Sumimangot siya. I captured it, too.

"Wala na bang definition sa dictionary mo ang salitang ngiti? Smile ang hinihingi ko," sabi ko sa kanya.

Nailing siya. I captured it, too. He ignored me and chewed, and I captured it. He ate. He drank his coffee. He peeked at me. He clicked his tongue. He tried to take my phone off my hand. I captured everything.

"Pambihira, Jianna. Para saan ba kasi 'yan?" untag niya.

"Ngumiti ka na lang kasi para tapos na."

Sumimangot lang uli siya. I clicked my tongue and stared at him.

This beautiful experiment is making me crazy. Mamamaalam na ba 'ko sa critical thinking ko?

I reached out and pulled his cheeks. "Ang cute mo, 'no?"

Pagbitiw ko sa kanya, iniurong niya ang sarili niya. He looked confused, startled, offended, and defensive.

"Tama si Helga. Ang arte mo. Para pisil lang sa pisngi..." sabi ko at nakangiting umirap. "Na-miss kita."

Now, he looked troubled while looking at me.

"I guess I'll miss you more sa mga susunod na araw..."

"Why?" tanong niya.

He must be so weirded out by now.

"Because you won't eat with me again. That's what you wanted, right? That's why you ignored my messages no'ng nasa Stanford ka. You're burdened by what we've been doing. You wanted a reset and instead of telling me exactly what you wanted, you hinted by ignoring me."

Nagbuga siya ng hangin. Bumigat naman ang pakiramdam ko.

"I'm sorry, Jianna."

"What's so wrong with being with me, Harry? Bakit ka nabu-burden? Am I not even a friend to you? Assistant lang talaga?" tanong ko pa. Sumasakit ang dibdib ko at nag-iinit ang mata ko. I swallowed to keep my emotions at bay. "Wala ka na bang ikukuwento tungkol kay Neah kaya burdened ka na?"

"I just..." Nag-iwas siya ng mata sa'kin. Alam kong wala siyang excuse. "I just wanted to be by myself, Jianna."

Nangalumbaba ako sa mesa. "I understand."

I saw his jaw hardened and worry darkened his face. Bakit ang daling basahin ng facial expressions ng taong 'to?

"I really understand, Harry," sabi ko sa kanya. "Even though... it's offensive and irritating. I should be mad, actually. Pero ano'ng magagawa ko?" I find even this offense fascinating. Dahil sino'ng tao ang kasing-weird niya? He's refusing me but instead of being relieved that I got what he wanted, he's burdened by his refusal. That's something else, right?

Gumaan ang mukha niya pagtingin niya sa'kin. "You should be mad."

"I know, right."

"You're not like most girls."

"You're not like most of my interests," I told him. "So, eat, Lord Commander. Baka sa pancakes bumigay ang pasensiya ko sa'yo."

He continued his meal while I continued to study him.

After breakfast, I went to laboratory 2 for my tasks. Pagdating ng lunch, hindi na 'ko sumabay kay Harry. But I ordered food and prepared it for him. Ayokong ako naman ang ma-burden ng pag-aalala na baka hindi siya kumain. By four in the afternoon, I took the blood test. By five, I submitted myself for an fMRI scanning. By seven in the evening, I have the results of those tests.

My hormones and my brain center confirmed the hypothesis-I'm in love with him.

Now, I should proceed with the second phase of the experiment-to try to go against the feelings. #1021g / 11182016