H.O.P.E.|| S.M.

Warrior

Brynlee's Point of View

After that day, people laid off me for a couple days but then everything went back to normal. The kids continued to harass me, Daniel continued to abuse me, and I continued to work. I was used to this life. My wound had healed for the most part. I had taken out the stitches so it's still a little red but it just looks like a shallow cut.  More people started to show up at the cafe to hear me sing, which made me more nervous, but I learned to cope with the anxiety. I had improved on my boxing skills so I was able to train people higher up. I always wondered, 'What's the point of me knowing how to fight and defend myself if I never use it?' Whenever someone comes to hurt me, I freeze up and don't move but I knew I could take them down with no problem. Either way, my life has been pretty great, considering what it used to be.

I never saw or talked to Shawn after that. I was going to his concert in 6 days. I had saved up enough money to get front row tickets. I couldn't wait to see him preform live again. Hearing him sing helped me forget about everything that is going on in my life. The days I don't wake up from nightmares, I wake up smiling because I usually got to dream about our hug that we shared. Whenever I want to give up, I remember that moment. I remember that one day someone will love me unconditionally and be there for me no matter what. I cling to that hope because it's all I have left.

-

"Where the hell do you think you are going?" Daniel yelled at me and slapped me across the face. I held back the tears and stood up straighter.

"I have to go to work" I stated blankly.

"You just got back from work you idiot! Don't lie to me! Where are you going?" He punched me in the gut and I hunched over trying not to make a noise.

"I have two jobs. I was working at the gym earlier, now I'm going to work at the cafe."

"When will you be back?"

"I should be back at around 11pm"

"You better be. I'll be waiting."

I nodded and walked off into the rain with my umbrella and my guitar in hand. It was pretty cold out and I felt the cold seep through my jacket and send goosebumps up my skin. I pulled my sweater closer around me and hoped I would be out of the rain soon.

I arrived and slipped in through back door. I do the usual of grabbing water, tuning my guitar, and doing some practice runs on the piano. People started coming in and I started to feel fidgety, nervous, and my breathing quickened. I took some deep breaths to calm down and regain my composure. I looked into the crowd and noticed a few girls and guys from school. They were nice but they never talked to me. I noticed a few regulars, a few new people, and someone I wasn't expecting. Sitting in the table closest to the stage in a beanie, black sweatshirt, and grey skinny jeans, was Shawn.

I smiled at him and he did the same in return. I didn't know seeing him would make me so happy but it did. I felt my body eases just knowing he was here. I went out into the ally way behind the shop to do some vocal warm-ups before my set. I was pretty dark out and I didn't see the three men come up me. They spun me around and surrounded me.

"What's a pretty lady like you doing out here all alone?" One of the men said.

"Um just warming up" I said nervously.

"All by yourself?" One said while the others took a step closer.

"Umm yeah?" I said getting into a defensive stance. One of them tried grabbing my arm and I punched him across the face. The rest of them tried attacking me and I just kept dodging and hitting them. One of them got a hit to my stomach but the adrenaline running through my veins made it easy to forget about the pain. I tripped one of them and they fell to the floor. I twisted another one of their arms behind their back and pushed them to the ground. The last one hesitated but charged after me. I sidestep, crouched to the floor, and stuck my foot out, tripping the last one. I elbowed him in the head, knocking him unconscious.

I sighed deeply, fell against the wall, and stared at my shaking hands. My heart was beating fast and I could hear it in my ears. My palms became sweaty and I felt light headed. I laid my head between my head and clenched my hands tightly trying to get control of my breathing. I felt someone place their hands on my shoulders and I could hear them distantly telling me to take slow breaths. I realized I was taking shallow breaths and it probably wasn't helping my panic attack.

One of the men started waking up so the person in front of me picked me up bridal style and carried me inside the door, locking the door behind us. He placed me down and left coming back a few minutes later holding water in front of me. With shaking hands, I grabbed the cup and took a small sip. I had calmed down significantly and finally realized that it was Shawn who had followed me out there. I smiled shyly up at him, and he gently placed his had gently on my face wiping away the tears that had apparently fallen.

"How did you do that?" He asked softly but genuinely curious.

"Do what?"

"Taken down all those men?"

"Oh umm I kinda train fighters and stuff"

"You do?" He says astonished.

"Umm yeah it's my job. I've been working there for Two years."

"That is so cool! Maybe you could teach me sometime."

"Yeah, just stop by the gym whenever. Now I should probably get to singing before I get fired."

I pull myself up, off the floor and walk into the bathroom to clean up my face to look presentable. I walk out on the mini stage and sit down at the piano. I do some quick warm ups and ay hello to the crowd. I didn't have a song I planned on singing but my hands had a mind off their own. I soon realized they were playing the keys to Warrior by Demi Lavato and I poured my heart and soul into the song.

This is a story that I have never told
I gotta get this off my chest to let it go
I need to take back the light inside you stole
You're a criminal
And you steal like you're a pro

All the pain and the truth
I wear like a battle wound
So ashamed, so confused
I was broken and bruised

Now I'm a warrior
Now I've got thicker skin
I'm a warrior
I'm stronger than I've ever been
And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in
I'm a warrior
And you can never hurt me again

Out of the ashes, I'm burning like a fire
You can save your apologies, you're nothing but a liar
I've got shame, I've got scars
That I will never show
I'm a survivor
In more ways than you know

Cause all the pain and the truth
I wear like a battle wound
So ashamed, so confused
I'm not broken or bruised

'Cause now I'm a warrior
Now I've got thicker skin
I'm a warrior
I'm stronger than I've ever been
And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in
I'm a warrior
And you can never hurt me

There's a part of me I can't get back
A little girl grew up too fast
All it took was once, I'll never be the same
Now I'm taking back my life today
Nothing left that you can say
Cause you are never gonna take the blame anyway

Now I'm a warrior
I've got thicker skin
I'm a warrior
I'm stronger than I've ever been
And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in
I'm a warrior
And you can never hurt me again

No oh, yeah, yeah

You can never hurt me again

I took a deep breath to collect myself and looked out into the crowd of about 35 people. They seemed shocked or in a haze. I looked over at Shawn and he sat there with a big smile on his face. Everyone slowly started to clap and I looked down and felt my checks heat up. I continued on with my set and for the rest of that night, I felt like nothing could bring me down.