A SWIM ACROSS TIME...

THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE.

We accept the love we think we deserve.
-The perks of being a wallflower.

So,the writing in italics would be a letter (Yes,a letter) .Its going to be scattered in the chapter .keep a box of tissue close by.

My Aunt Layla was a smart and beautiful woman but yet she stayed in an abusive marriage for five years. She was on the brink of death when she made the choice to break the silence ;it wasn't an easy thing to do considering she had been cut off from her family.

Today,she is a working single mother ,who lives only for her eight year old son. She fought tooth and nails for his custody ,even though it was her right . She told me she stayed because she thought he would change ,but she was wrong.

"The only thing i can never regret is having Jamal as a son. But God knows I don't think I can ever forgive him . I can't even forgive myself ." She confessed me to me one day and then I was a bit surprised because she is one of the best people I know . At the time I didn't understand that being best isnt synonymous to perfect . She was human after all." I only told one person what was going on and that's my best friend.But she told me to keep bearing patience ." She had laughed bitterly .

"But one day I looked at me lying battered on the floor and i took a good long look at Jamal crying by my side . And I said to myself 'enough' " Her voice cracked as I struggled to keep my tears at bay ,but they fell anyway .

She had told me that she had the strong desire to just kill him off one day. Deep in my heart, I secretly wished she did. Then maybe,she wouldn't have gone through all that,maybe her son wouldn't have seen all the things he shouldn't have . She had nightmares sometimes and she gets jumpy most of the time.

I don't think I have ever hated a person in my life than I hated her husband and I have only seen him thrice in my life .

"Does he hit her?" She had asked me about my parents . it was at the beginning of their problems . I shook my head at her. She shook her head sadly. "Marriage is not supposed to be sad ," she had told me ." promise me Charo that you will never made the mistakes your mother and I made."I remembered how I nodded my head at her ,without fully understanding the weight of the promise .

I liked her because she treated me like an adult ,like just another human being ,not just a sixteen year old girl with lots of anger issues . "Always stand for what is right dear,even if you get hated for it ." After her horrible divorce she took it up in herself to fight for other women,no one should go through what she did ,she said . But people called her all sorts of things . They said she was a bitter divorced ,impatient woman who wants to ruin other's happy marriages because her own didn't turn out well.

"But I forgive them ,because they don't understand ." She had smiled then ,but I saw the hurt in her eyes . She was always smiling,especially when family members tried to push her into another marriage.

She once told me that even though she is fully aware that all men are not the same,she was scared of getting married . And she doesn't really mind,so long she had Jamal ,she would be happy. "I will make sure that Jamal will not turn out like his father ,sometimes,I get scared he would. But then,I look into his eyes ,and I see warmth in there ." She had vowed ,and I assured her he would not. He was such a good kid.